who am i sexually essay

Questioning Your Sexuality Is More Than Just a Phase

W e don’t live in a world where sexuality is commonly accepted as something that can change, bend, or even be questioned in private. The cultural presumption, oftentimes, is that people are heterosexual until stated otherwise. And if they are not heterosexual, then they will fit neatly into one of the letters in the LGBTQIA+ acronym for life. It’s an unfortunate bind that can create tension for anyone who doesn’t feel completely aligned with heterosexual or homosexual desires, or who notices that their sexual desires ebb and flow.

Contrary to popular belief, the “Q” in “LGBTQIA+” isn’t just a reference to “queer.” It also calls attention to those of us who are “questioning.” Anyone who isn’t sure how to categorize their sexuality can fall under the umbrella of questioning. In fact, they may struggle with reconciling their desires and attractions with the label under which they primarily identify. This unsureness can stir up anxiety for the person experiencing it as well as potential partners who may want definitive answers before committing to a sexual or romantic relationship with them. Questioning is thought of as a brief stop along the path to “figuring it all out.” It isn’t thought of as “real.”

We don’t know what to do with people who are amid exploring what feels sexually authentic to them. It just feels too messy and confusing. But if we acknowledged the complicated nature of sexuality and how much it varies and changes, we would all have more freedom to explore who our authentic sexual selves are. Questioning is more than just a phase—it’s a practice and identity that is more common than we would like to admit.

There is more to sexual orientation than the binary of being either heterosexual or homosexual . But it wasn’t until the 1948 publishing of Alfred Kinsey’s pivotal work, Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, that there was an accounting for the area that exists between straight and gay. The Kinsey Scale was the first measure of heterosexuality to homosexuality with many gradients in between. Ranging from 0-6, the idea of a sexual orientation scale, or spectrum, allowed for categorizing people over time. A Kinsey “2” score, for instance, alluded to someone who is predominantly heterosexual, and, as the scale called it, “only incidentally homosexual.” The incidentally homosexual term referred to in practice or in feelings or thoughts. The range from 2-5 on the Kinsey Scale is the space where perhaps the most questioning occurs because that’s where there isn’t a completely solid throughline between one’s attractions and sexual partners.

Despite the existence of this range of sexual orientation, we don’t give space to those who are questioning. For people who have been in only heterosexual relationships and want to explore other desires, for instance, it may feel intrusive or wrong to waltz into LGBTQIA+ spaces. On the other hand, people who have not been 100% heterosexual, especially men, may receive judgements from straight partners who feel they could be hiding or repressing their true desires. But sexuality is more complex than that. Our thoughts and behaviors may not always align. People may be drawn to erotica or porn that depicts sex that varies from their own sexual experiences, or have powerful fantasies that are jarring because of the gender of the people involved. People can identify as straight but have romantic crushes on people of the same sex. We may call it “bromance” or a “friend crush,” but that can also someteims have sexual undertones. Or people may label times when they had partners who didn’t match their sexual orientation as “experimenting.” All of these incredibly common experiences show how we would all do better to recognize questioning as valid and helpful for developing a fuller picture of our sexuality.

Questioning isn’t limited to just sexual orientation. It can also include gender identity and gender expression . Over the course of the lifespan, people may experience incongruence between their biological sex and the way they feel internally or how they would like to be seen by others. It may take time to land on a gender identity that rings true, and this could also change as new insights develop and someone’s sense of self develops. With so many ways to describe gender identity and expression , it makes sense that it could take time to understand what makes the most sense for each person.

Questioning can also occur when people contemplate the ways in which they would like to engage in relationships. People may question monogamy or whether they may be asexual or aromantic. They may need to experience different ways of being in relationships to determine what’s right for them. Identifying as questioning can be helpful when dating and engaging in different types of relationships. It signals to potential partners that you’re exploring and do not have fixed ideals about relationships at the moment. This can take the pressure off of dating as a whole, and helps set realistic expectations for people you date. There are so many people who are questioning, but feel pressured to say they’re looking for a long-term relationship or something casual when they really don’t know what will work for them. It’s way better to say at the outset and minimize confusion or hurt feelings.

Read More: Sex Changes as We Age. Let’s Embrace That

The process of questioning is non-linear and can occur throughout a person’s life. After having worked with many questioning clients, I know how important it is to claim questioning as an identity for people doing the deep work of trying to figure out their attractions and relationship needs. I’ve seen my clients embrace saying “I don’t know” rather than get embarrassed or ashamed when they're asked about what they're looking for. And I’ve seen them connect with other people who are also questioning, and want support and connection while they discover who they are.

Questioning doesn’t have to be stressful or anxiety-inducing. We naturally question what and who we like, how we want to be treated and what kinds of partnerships and communities we want to build. People who are exploring their sexuality deserve the space to do so, no matter how long it takes or what the outcome is. Because sexuality can change and surprise so many of us, it’s important to recognize questioning as an authentic experience—for others and for ourselves.

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Sexual Identity & Expression

While your sexuality can be fluid and may change over the course of time, your sexual identity plays an important role in who you are.

Familiarizing yourself with the different concepts and terms that may be associated with sexual identity can better help you and others affirm, ally, and feel empowered in your romantic or sexual interests—no matter how you may choose to identify.

Frequently Asked Questions

The four components of sexual identity include: biological sex, gender identity, social sex-role, and sexual orientation—all of which may combine and/or conflict to form an individual's unique sexual identity.

Your sexual identity is how you see yourself in relation to who you are attracted to romantically, emotionally, and/or sexually. Sexual identity terms refer to words and phrases used to describe human sexuality and orientation including (but not limited to) gay, lesbian, bisexual, and heterosexual.

One study that examined sexual orientations of people from teenage years through early adulthood showed that changes occurred throughout the duration, noting that "Substantial changes were common not only from late adolescence to the early 20s but also from the early 20s to the late 20s, indicating that sexual orientation development continues throughout emerging adulthood."

Explore Sexual Identity & Expression

More in living well.

Shively MG, De Cecco JP. Components of sexual identity .  J Homosex . 1977;3(1):41-48. doi:10.1300/J082v03n01_04

Kaestle CE. Sexual orientation trajectories based on sexual attractions, partners, and identity: a longitudinal investigation from adolescence through young adulthood using a U.S. Representative sample .  J Sex Res . 2019;56(7):811-826. doi:10.1080/00224499.2019.1577351

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sex ed by em

• Jul 10, 2023

Understanding and Embracing Your Sexual Identity: A Guide to Self-Discovery and Acceptance

Introducing: you.

Welcome to life, where the first breath you take is taken as you are assigned a gender and a name. Identity is everything though, right?

The truth is that identity is shaped by society, and while it may be a social construct, it holds significant value in our journey of self-discovery and belonging. Discovering and understanding our identity helps us navigate and connect with our communities, but it is also important to realize that identity is not definite. It is playful and able to be changed at your whim.

When it comes to embracing your sexual identity, why can it be so overwhelming to understand and embrace?

There’s no way to sugarcoat this: sex can be an uncomfortable topic. While it’s natural to explore one’s own sexuality, our society continues to shame people for being, well, sexual. And to take it one step forward, our society also has an undercurrent of homophobia, so if you’re exploring anything other than heterosexuality you are shamed. Know that it is normal to carry shame because of this but that you need not feel it. Your body, your being and your sexuality are all parts of you to be proud of.

How do we discover our sexual identity?

Sexual identity refers to an individual's enduring pattern of emotional, romantic, and/or sexual attractions to men, women, both genders, or neither gender.

Exploration and education is the name of the game when it comes to understanding your identity. If you stay within a bubble you will never know what lies outside your bubble aka if you never know there is more than heterosexuality you may never know that there are other options!

When you are of an appropriate age it is okay to try new things, sexually that is. If you feel drawn towards kissing someone of the same gender, go for it (as long as it’s consensual of course). There are also online resources , different types of sexual content , podcasts , fantasy (your imagination), support groups and more!

Types of Sexuality

Here is an awesome list of all different types of sexuality:

Allosexual: those who experience sexual attraction to others. Allosexual individuals can be bisexual, pansexual, queer, gay, lesbian, heterosexual, or so forth. Some note allosexual is the opposite of asexual. 2

Asexual : People who are asexual experience little or no sexual attraction to others or have limited to little desire for sexual contact. It’s important to remember not all asexual folks are repulsed or refuse sex. People who identify as asexual don’t always experience no desire for romance and may have many successful relationships regardless of sexual contact.

Bicurious : Someone who is bicurious has historically been heterosexual, but is considering or curious about engaging in sexual activity with an individual who may have a sex or gender different than their partners in the past. The word “curious” should always be used instead of confused to help decrease the shame and stigma often associated with non-heterosexual activity.

Bisexual : Individuals who experience sexual attraction to both sexes and genders. Did you know that bisexual + or bi+ (an identity label that encompasses all non-monosexual identities) female population in the US is larger than that of lesbians, gay men, and bi+ men combined? 3

Demisexual: A person who often feels sexual attraction after building an emotional bond or connection with someone. Those who are demisexual note they do not feel immediately attracted to individuals based on looks, smell, and other features.

Fluid : An individual whose sexuality changes and is not fixed. Sexually fluid individuals can utilize other sexual orientation terms to describe themselves or may feel they do not resonate with any of them.

Gay: Men whose primary sexual attraction is to other men. This includes transgender men who are attracted to other men.

Graysexual: Individuals who don’t identify as asexual, but also feel less sexual attraction than most folks. Therefore, they fall into the gray area of sexuality.

Heterosexual: A person who is sexually or romantically attracted to people of the opposite sex.

Lesbian : Women whose primary sexual attraction is to other women. This includes transgender women who are attracted to other women whether cisgender, transgender, or nonbinary .

Omnisexual: Individuals who are attracted to “all” individuals regardless of sex or gender often identify as omnisexual.

Pansexual : People who are attracted to individuals regardless of their sex or gender go by the term pansexual . The term has come a long way and even has its own history of advocacy and activism. Even now there is still some debate about its appropriateness.

Polysexual: Poly stems from the Greek prefix for “many.” Polysexual individuals are attracted to multiple or many genders or sexes. Some people assume polysexual is the same as polyamory, but they should not be used interchangeably.

Queer: an umbrella term used for those who are not heterosexual or cisgender. Queer was historically used as a slur to refer to LGBTQ+ individuals. In recent years it has been liberated and taken back by the community. But, some LGBTQ+ people still consider this term offensive. Only use the term if someone has expressed comfort with it.

Questioning : Those who are in the process of exploring or feel unsure about their sexuality have a questioning sexuality .

Sapiosexual: Individuals who experience sexual attraction based on intelligence versus sex or gender. Both LGBTQ+ folks and heterosexual folks can be sapiosexual . Sapiosexual individuals can still find physical characteristics or qualities attractive, but they are not the most important.

*List by https://www.choosingtherapy.com/exploring-your-sexuality/

How to Embrace Yourself

Embracing your sexual identity is a deeply personal journey. That takes time and patience. Other great steps towards self love include:

Self-Reflection : Take time to reflect on your feelings, desires, and attractions. Explore what brings you joy and fulfillment in your sexual experiences.

Education and Awareness : Educate yourself about different sexual orientations, gender identities, and expressions. This knowledge can help you understand and validate your own experiences.

Seek Support : Surround yourself with a supportive and inclusive community. Connect with friends, online forums, or LGBTQ+ organizations that provide a safe space for exploring and discussing your sexual identity.

Self-Acceptance : Embrace and accept yourself as you are. Recognize that your sexual identity is valid and deserving of respect, regardless of societal norms or expectations.

Self-Expression : Explore ways to express your sexual identity authentically. This can include choosing labels or terms that resonate with you, expressing yourself through clothing or personal style, or engaging in activities that align with your sexual preferences.

Communication : Engage in open and honest conversations about your sexual identity with trusted individuals, such as friends, partners, or therapists. Sharing your journey can help foster understanding and acceptance.

Boundaries and Consent : Set clear boundaries and prioritize your own comfort and consent in all sexual interactions. Embracing your sexual identity also involves honoring your own needs and desires.

Get what You Deserve

Understanding and embracing your sexual identity is a transformative and empowering process that can have a profound impact on your overall well-being and happiness. It's essential to embark on a journey of self-discovery, where you can explore and understand your own unique experiences and feelings.

Recognize that your sexual identity is an integral part of who you are, and it is valid. Embrace and celebrate it as a beautiful aspect of your identity. Accepting yourself allows you to build a strong foundation for self-confidence and self-love.

Living authentically means being true to yourself and not compromising your sexual identity for the sake of others' expectations or societal norms. It is about embracing and expressing who you are without fear or shame. Surround yourself with people and communities that value and respect your authentic self.

In every aspect of your life, you deserve love, acceptance, and respect. You have the right to form meaningful connections, pursue fulfilling relationships, and live a life that aligns with your true self. Remember that your sexual identity is valid, and you deserve to be celebrated and embraced for who you are.

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Is My Sexuality Who I Am?

‘You’re denying who you really are!’ That’s what many people think about my choice to remain celibate and single rather than enter into a gay relationship. My sexuality is just who I am, they say, and therefore I should accept, embrace and express it to live my best life.

The view that our sexual orientation is our identity is a common one. You can often hear it in the background of celebrity coming out stories; people speak of being honest about who they really are and letting the world see the real them. Stonewall says that the main reason people come out is that they ‘just want to be honest about who they are’. 1 For them, it’s an identity issue. Many Christians who support the acceptability of same-sex relationships also believe that sexual orientation is part of our identity. They argue that God wouldn’t ask us to deny part of who we are, and therefore gay relationships must be acceptable for those who are attracted to people of the same sex.

Finding our identity

But before we can ask who we are, we first have to ask how we find our identity. The view that our sexuality is our identity is an example of internal identity formation, the idea that who we are is based on what we find inside ourselves, our feelings and desires. In internal identity formation, nothing external (such as our bodies or our communities) can dictate who we are; all that matters is what we find inside. So, if we look inside and find romantic and sexual desires for those of the same sex, that is who we are, we’re gay. It is this understanding which makes sexuality labels (such as gay, straight, lesbian, and bisexual) so important in modern culture. They’re important because we believe they’re about who we are.

Feelings and desires can’t be a stable basis for identity.

But is internal identity formation a good way to find our identity? I’m not sure it is. To be life-giving, an identity needs to be solid and stable so that it can give us a good sense of worth and purpose at all times. But internal identity can’t do that. Internal identity is inherently unstable. It’s based on feelings and desires, but these can change. Even sexual orientation can change and is not necessarily static. 2 Feelings and desires can’t be a stable basis for identity. Internal identity is also ambiguous. Our feelings and desires can conflict and compete. If we have two irreconcilable desires, which do we embrace to find the true us? And internal identity is inconsistent. We all recognise that we might experience some feelings and desires, even sexual desires, which we wouldn’t embrace as our identity. What if we look inside and find a desire to kill lots of people or a desire to have sex with someone who is married? The reality is, none of us really believes in internal identity; rather we pick and choose from our feelings and desires, claiming as identity those which fit what our culture tells us should be our identity.

If internal identity doesn’t work, is there a better alternative? Some people would go for external identity, rooting their sense of self and worth in what others think of them. (Or more often what they think others think of them!) Identities rooted in our job or marital status or abilities are all ultimately just forms of external identity—we care about them because of how they make people view us. But external identity isn’t much good either. What if others think badly of you? What if the thing you think makes you look good changes? What if they change their mind? There’s no stability for our sense of worth and purpose in an external identity.

The better alternative

But there is a better alternative. The better alternative is divine identity. Divine identity isn’t discovered within, and it’s not dependent on the changing opinion of others; it’s given to us by God, and it’s static, stable and life-giving. For every human, this identity is as someone created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27). Bearing the image of God speaks of our worth, our value, and the fact that our lives are worthy of preservation and protection (see Genesis 9:6; James 3:9). And for every Christian, there’s an even better identity: identity as a child of God, adopted by him, and eternally loved by him (John 1:12; Romans 8:14-17). This isn’t an identity we have to earn by living a certain way, and it isn’t something we have to discover inside ourselves; it’s an identity given to us by God, and because it’s based on how God has created us (for all humans) and what God has done in us in Christ (for Christians) it is solid, stable, and unchanging.

Bearing the image of God speaks of our worth, our value, and the fact that our lives are worthy of preservation and protection.

So how does this all apply to sexuality? It means my sexuality isn’t my identity. There’s no doubt it’s a real part of my life experience, but it isn’t who I am; it isn’t the real me. The real me is one who bears God’s image and one who has been adopted as his son. This means that the way to live my best life isn’t to accept, embrace, and express my sexuality; the way to live my best life is to accept, embrace, and express my God-given identity, to live as one who is loved by God, and who gets to follow the Creator’s plan for human-flourishing. As a follower of Jesus, I don’t have to deny who I really am; in following Jesus, I get to find out who I really am, and I get to enjoy my best life by living that out.

Andrew explores these themes in more detail in his book  Finding Your Best Identity: A Short Christian Introduction to Identity, Sexuality and Gender (IVP, 2022) .

• ‘ Coming Out As a Young Person ’, Stonewall. Accessed 2 April 2020.
• ‘ What Do We Actually Know about Sexual Orientation? Part 2 ’, The Centre for Faith Sexuality and Gender .

Published 12th January 2021

Andrew Bunt

Andrew is part of a church on the south-east coast and is Emerging Generations director at Living Out. He studied theology at Durham University and King's College London and is the author of 'People Not Pronouns' (Grove Books) and 'Finding Your Best Identity' (IVP). In the words of one of his friends: 'On paper you should be boring, but you're actually quite good fun.'

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What Am I Sexually?

Free what am i sexually assessment.

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What is What Am I Sexually Assessment?

The “What Am I Sexually” assessment is a tool designed to help individuals explore and understand their sexual orientation and preferences. 

It allows users to answer a series of questions related to their feelings, attractions, and experiences, providing insights into their sexuality. The assessment aims to promote self-discovery and personal awareness in matters of sexual identity.

Who can derive advantages from this assessment of What Am I Sexually?

The “What Am I Sexually” assessment can be advantageous for individuals questioning or exploring their sexual orientation. It fosters self-awareness, providing clarity and validation for those unsure about their sexual identity. People seeking self-acceptance benefit by acknowledging diverse sexual orientations.

It aids in understanding desires and attractions in a non-judgmental way. Additionally, it serves as an educational resource for those interested in learning about different sexual orientations and identities. Mental health professionals can use it to facilitate discussions and support clients in their sexual exploration. Overall, it offers valuable insights to anyone open to understanding and embracing their sexuality.

What Am I Sexually Assessment Accuracy

The accuracy of the “What Am I Sexually” assessment depends on several factors. While it can be a useful tool for self-exploration and awareness, it should not be considered a definitive or clinical diagnosis of one’s sexual orientation.

Sexual orientation is a complex and multifaceted aspect of an individual’s identity, influenced by various factors. Online assessments may not capture the full complexity of human sexuality and individual experiences. For a more accurate understanding of one’s sexuality, professional guidance from qualified mental health experts or counselors is recommended.

Types of What Am I Sexually Assessment

Self-report questionnaires, kinsey scale test, klein sexual orientation grid, the shively-dececco scale, close relationships scale, sexual identity scale, handling sexuality issues.

Handling sexuality issues requires a sensitive and understanding approach. Here are some important steps to consider:

• Self-reflection and acceptance: Encourage individuals to reflect on their feelings and attractions without judgment and to accept themselves for who they are.
• Seek professional support: Recommend seeking guidance from qualified mental health professionals or counselors who specialize in sexuality-related issues.
• Safe environment: Create a safe and non-judgmental space for open discussions about sexuality, allowing individuals to express themselves freely.
• Education and resources: Provide accurate and inclusive information about different sexual orientations and identities to foster understanding and empathy.
• Support networks: Encourage individuals to connect with supportive communities or organizations that can offer understanding and validation.
• Respect boundaries: Respect personal boundaries and choices, understanding that everyone’s journey is unique.
• Address stigma: Challenge and combat societal stigma surrounding diverse sexual orientations to create a more inclusive and accepting environment.
• Consent and communication: Emphasize the importance of clear communication and enthusiastic consent in all sexual relationships.
• Encourage self-care: Promote self-care practices to cope with any emotional challenges that may arise during the exploration of sexuality.
• Stay updated: Stay informed about evolving perspectives and research in the field of human sexuality to offer the best support possible.

Remember, handling sexuality issues requires empathy, compassion, and an ongoing commitment to support individuals on their unique paths of self-discovery and self-acceptance.

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Sexuality explained

Actions for this page.

• Sexuality is diverse, and there are many different types. It can take time to figure out the sexuality that fits you best. And your sexuality can change over time. 
• Coming to terms with your sexuality can be a very liberating, exciting and positive experience.
• Sexuality is an important part of who you are. There is no right or wrong, it’s about what’s right for you. 
• Some people have a hard time accepting others who are different to themselves. If someone gives you a hard time about your sexuality, it’s good to talk to someone about it. You don’t need to deal with it by yourself.  

On this page

Different types of sexuality, discrimination based on sexuality, sexuality and mental health, helping someone struggling with their sexuality and mental health, where to get help.

Sexuality is not about who you have sex with, or how often you have it. Sexuality is about your sexual feelings, thoughts, attractions and behaviours towards other people. You can find other people physically, sexually or emotionally attractive, and all those things are a part of your sexuality. Sexuality is diverse and personal, and it is an important part of who you are. Discovering your sexuality can be a very liberating, exciting and positive experience. Some people experience discrimination due to their sexuality. If someone gives you a hard time about your sexuality, it’s good to talk to someone about it.

Sometimes, it can take time to figure out the sexuality that fits you best. And your sexuality can change over time. It can be confusing; so don’t worry if you are unsure. You might be drawn to men or to women, to both or to neither. There is no right or wrong – it’s about what’s right for you. And while there are common terms to describe different types of sexuality, you don’t have to adopt a label to describe yourself.

Heterosexual and homosexual

Most people are attracted to the opposite sex – boys who like girls, and women who like men, for example. These people are heterosexual, or ‘straight’. Some people are attracted to the same sex. These people are homosexual. Around 10 per cent of young Australians experience same-sex attraction, most during puberty. ‘Lesbian’ is the common term for people who identify as women and are same-sex attracted. ‘Gay’ is the most common term for people who identify as men and are same-sex attracted, although women identifying as lesbian also sometimes use this word. The Better Health Channel has more information on lesbian sexuality and gay male sexuality .

Sexuality can be more complicated than being straight or gay. Some people are attracted to both men and women, and are known as bisexual. Bisexual does not mean the attraction is evenly weighted – a person may have stronger feelings for one gender than another. And this can vary depending on who they meet. There are different kinds of bisexuality. Some people who are attracted to men and women still consider themselves to be mainly straight or gay. Or they might have sexual feelings towards both genders but only have intercourse with one. Other people see sexual attraction as more grey than black and white. These people find everyday labels too rigid. Some prefer to identify as ‘queer’. And others use the term ‘pan’, or ‘pansexual’, to show they are attracted to different kinds of people no matter what their gender, identity or expression. There are many differences between individuals, so bisexuality is a general term only. You can read more about it at the Better Health Channel’s page on bisexuality .

A person who identifies as asexual (‘ace’ for short) is someone who does not experience, or experiences very little, sexual attraction. Asexuality is not a choice, like abstinence (where someone chooses not to have sex with anyone, whether they are attracted to them or not). Asexuality is a sexual orientation, like homosexuality or heterosexuality. Some people may strongly identify with being asexual, except for a few infrequent experiences of sexual attraction (grey-asexuality). Some people feel sexual attraction only after they develop a strong emotional bond with someone (this is known as demisexuality). Other people experience asexuality in a range of other ways.

Equality and freedom from discrimination are fundamental human rights that belong to all people. In most states in Australia, including Victoria, it is against the law to discriminate against someone because of their sexual orientation, gender identity or lawful sexual activity. However, discrimination can still occur. If you think you have been discriminated against External Link or victimised because of your sexuality ( or a range of other reasons External Link ) contact the Victorian Equal Opportunity and Human Rights Commission External Link . For information on the legal obligations of employers regarding discrimination based on sexual identity, see the Victorian Equal Opportunity and Human Rights Commission External Link webpage on equal opportunity practice guidelines.

LGBTIQA+ people have an increased risk of depression, anxiety, substance abuse, homelessness, self-harming and suicidal thoughts, compared with the general population. This is particularly true of young LGBTIQA+ people who are coming to terms with their sexuality and experiencing victimisation and bullying at school. Some of the stressful experiences that can affect the mental health of an LGBTIQA+ person are:

• feeling different from other people
• being bullied (verbally or physically)
• feeling pressure to deny or change their sexuality
• feeling worried about coming out, and then being rejected or isolated
• feeling unsupported or misunderstood.

These pressures are on top of all the other stuff people have to deal with in life such as managing school, finding a job, forming relationships and making sense of your identity and place in the world.

If you are worried that someone you know has a mental health problem, look out for changes in their mood, behaviour, relationships, appetite, sleep patterns, coping and thinking. If these changes last more than a couple of weeks, talk to them about getting help. A good place to start is their doctor, or a phone or online service such as QLife External Link , beyondblue External Link or eheadspace External Link (for young people). If you are struggling with your own sexuality:

• Get support if you’re finding it hard to cope. Try talking to someone you trust – a friend, relative, doctor or counsellor, or use a helpline such as QLife External Link , beyondblue External Link or eheadspace External Link .
• Don’t hang around someone if they are abusive to you.
• Remember, there is no rush to figure out your sexuality. Take your time. And don’t feel pressured to put a label on it.
• If you think you’re gay but you don’t want to ‘come out’, it’s okay. If you want, you can read more about coming out External Link .

For information about your rights:

• Victorian Equal Opportunity and Human Rights Commission External Link

If you want to talk to someone, chat online, or find out more about LGBTIQA+ issues:

• QLife External Link (counselling and referral service for LGBTIQA+ people) – Tel. 1800 184 527
• headspace External Link (mental health service for ages 12–25) – Tel. 1800 650 890
• ReachOut External Link (youth mental health service)
• Beyond Blue External Link (for anyone feeling depressed or anxious) – Tel. 1300 22 4636
• Lifeline External Link (support for anyone having a personal crisis) – Tel. 13 11 14
• Kids Helpline External Link Tel. 1800 55 1800
• Switchboard External Link Tel. 1800 184 527 (telephone counselling, information and referrals)
• Suicide Call Back Service External Link Tel. 1300 659 467 (for anyone thinking about suicide)
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Who am I as a Sexual Being? The Role of Sexual Self-Concept Between Dispositional Mindfulness and Sexual Satisfaction among Child Sexual Abuse Survivors

Roxanne guyon.

1 Université du Québec à Montréal, Canada

Mylène Fernet

Marianne girard, marie-marthe cousineau.

2 Université de Montréal, Canada

Monique Tardif

Natacha godbout.

Childhood sexual abuse (CSA) is associated with long-lasting and pervasive impacts on survivors’ sexual health, particularly on their sexual satisfaction. Dispositional mindfulness has been found to be associated with greater sexual satisfaction among adult CSA survivors. However, the mechanisms involved in this association remain understudied. The present study examined the role of sexual self-concept (i.e., sexual esteem, sexual preoccupation, and sexual depression) in the relationship between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction among CSA survivors. A total of 176 adult CSA survivors (60.6% women, 39.4% men) completed an online survey assessing dispositional mindfulness, sexual self-concept, and sexual satisfaction. Path analyses revealed that dispositional mindfulness was positively related to sexual satisfaction through a significant indirect effect of higher sexual esteem and lower sexual depression. The integrative model explained 66.5% of the variance in sexual satisfaction. These findings highlight the key roles that dispositional mindfulness and sexual self-concept play in CSA survivors’ sexual satisfaction. Implications for interventions based on trauma-sensitive mindfulness targeting the sexual self-concept are discussed, as they may promote sexual satisfaction in adult CSA survivors.

Introduction

Childhood sexual abuse (CSA) is widely recognized as a form of trauma associated with long-lasting and pervasive impacts on survivors’ sexual satisfaction ( Bigras et al., 2020 ). These impacts can be understood in light of the traumatic sexualization that can result from CSA. Traumatic sexualization refers to one of the four dynamics (i.e., trauma-causing factors) of the Traumagenic Dynamics Model developed by Finkelhor and Browne (1985) , which postulates that the abusive context in which sexuality was introduced to a child may impair psychosexual development. Therefore, traumatic sexualization may increase the risk of suffering from a wide range of sexual sequelae later in life (e.g., using sexuality to meet emotional needs, sexual dysfunction, sexual aversion or compulsion, flashbacks, etc.). Such sexual sequelae may especially contribute to lower sexual satisfaction in adulthood ( Bigras et al., 2015 ; Rellini et al., 2011 ). Sexual satisfaction refers to the subjective appreciation of the positive and negative aspects of one’s sexual relationships ( Lawrance & Byers, 1995 ). Sexual satisfaction can occur independently from sexual function and can be a key focus in treatment ( Ferenidou et al., 2008 ), especially in CSA survivors who may be particularly impaired in this respect. Several studies have investigated how to foster satisfying sex lives among CSA survivors (see reviews of Bigras et al., 2020 ; Guyon, Fernet, Canivet et al., 2020a ). Mindfulness has been identified as a promising determinant of resilience in the sexual sphere ( Dussault et al., 2020 ; Godbout et al., 2020 ), but empirical evidence regarding the link between mindfulness and sexual satisfaction among CSA survivors remains limited.

Dispositional Mindfulness and Sexual Satisfaction

Mindfulness has been conceptualized as receptivity and awareness of, and attention to internal and external experiences as they occur ( Brown & Ryan, 2003 ). All individuals have the capacity to cultivate mindfulness ( Baer et al., 2006 ), even though an individual’s mindfulness dispositions may vary in function of the levels of practice and integration throughout life. Mindfulness can be achieved through meditation, which aims to develop awareness ( Kabat-Zinn, 2015 ). However, Langer (1989) suggests that mindfulness includes situational awareness, sensitivity to changes in the environment, and control over one’s thoughts, which are not limited simply to the context of meditation. In this sense, mindfulness can be practiced daily and can manifest as an inherent capacity or trait (i.e., dispositional mindfulness; Brown & Ryan, 2003 ).

Dispositional mindfulness has been associated with more adaptive sexual outcomes, such as greater sexual functioning (e.g., orgasm capacity, arousal), sexual well-being, and sexual satisfaction in community and clinical samples (e.g., Déziel et al., 2018 ; Godbout et al., 2020 ; Khaddouma et al., 2015 ; Newcombe & Weaver, 2016 ; Pepping et al., 2018 ). Specifically, Khaddouma et al. (2015) found that attending to and noticing internal and external stimuli was related to increased sexual satisfaction. Similarly, Pepping et al. (2018) found that the association between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction was mediated by emotional regulation. Another study investigating this link in victimized individuals found that cumulative childhood interpersonal trauma was related to lower dispositional mindfulness, which in turn led to lower sexual satisfaction ( Godbout et al., 2020 ). The previous findings, combined with those attesting to the significant potential of mindfulness-based interventions to improve the sexual satisfaction of survivors of sexual trauma ( Brotto et al., 2012 ; Esper & da Silva Gherardi-Donato, 2019 ), support the need to better understand what may link these two variables using empirical data. However, research documenting the mechanisms involved in the relationship between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction are lacking.

Although studies have found that CSA can negatively affect sexual function, and in turn, sexual satisfaction ( Lacelle et al., 2012 ), few have specifically examined the effects of CSA on sexual satisfaction from an identity perspective. Yet, CSA can profoundly disrupt survivors’ sense of self ( Saha et al., 2011 ), which refers to one’s experience within the world in terms of a sense of individuality, unity, and continuity ( Cicchetti & Beeghly, 1990 ), and impair sexual identity development ( Bigras et al., 2015 ). In particular, survivors may come to see themselves as sex objects, fundamentally broken, or as bad people because of the abuse they endured; this can taint their relationship with sexuality in the longer term ( Maltz, 2012 ). These identity and self-perception outcomes, grouped under the dimension of sexual self-concept, are associated with lower sexual satisfaction in CSA survivors ( Bigras et al., 2015 ; Guyon et al., 2020a ). Thereby, sexual self-concept could be a mechanism explaining the link between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction; however, this postulate remains to be empirically examined.

Sexual Self-Concept

Sexual self-concept refers to the ideas, thoughts, and feelings individuals have about themselves as sexual persons, and is an important component of sexual health ( Deutsch et al., 2014 ). Sexual self-concept develops mostly during adolescence through sexual growth and experience, and is shaped by social expectations ( O’Sullivan et al., 2006 ). Snell and Papini (1989) were among the first to conceptualize and operationalize sexual self-concept by developing a measure that has become a landmark in the scientific literature. According to these authors, sexual self-concept is a construct encompassing sexual esteem (i.e., positive outlook on and confidence in one’s capacity to experience sexuality in a satisfying and enjoyable way), sexual depression (i.e., feelings of depression regarding one’s sex life), and sexual preoccupation (i.e., the tendency to think about sex excessively).

Studies show that dispositional mindfulness can encourage introspection, with authenticity and acceptance ( Chen & Murphy, 2019 ; Shapiro et al., 2006 ), greater self-awareness, and less self-evaluation ( Hanley & Garland, 2017 ; Verplanken et al., 2007 ). Individuals who exhibit enhanced mindfulness may have more space to process their stressful experiences and perceive them as something that can contribute positively to their lives (i.e., positive reappraisal; Garland et al., 2011 ). Thus, CSA survivors with greater mindfulness dispositions may evaluate themselves less negatively or present less rigid thought patterns when appraising themselves as sexual beings (i.e., sexual self-concept); this may be due to the fact that they are more likely to have a nuanced view of their trauma and its impact on themselves as sexual beings. Dispositional mindfulness can also promote greater mental clarity in terms of thoughts and emotions ( Kang et al., 2015 ). This can be particularly important among trauma survivors, as they are more prone to automatic functioning (i.e., undertaking actions with little awareness) on a daily basis ( Evans et al., 2015 ). This may hinder their ability to connect with their sexual self and, ultimately, to positively evaluate their sexuality (i.e., sexual satisfaction).

Although no study has directly examined the role of sexual self-concept in the link between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction, previous studies provide evidence for this underlying mechanism. Notably, past studies have shown that sexual esteem, one of the components of sexual self-concept, may act as an explanatory mechanism for sexual satisfaction in university students ( Peixoto et al., 2018 ) and CSA survivors ( Lemieux & Byers, 2008 ). Antičević et al. (2017) have shown that lower sexual self-esteem and higher sexual depression were linked to lower sexual satisfaction in the general Croatian population. Similarly, a study conducted among CSA survivors demonstrated that those who displayed higher levels of sexual depression tended to be less sexuality satisfied, while those with higher levels of sexual esteem were more sexually satisfied ( Guyon, Fernet & Godbout, 2020b ). Taken together, these findings support the plausibility that dispositional mindfulness might be positively associated with greater sexual self-concept, which in turn could lead to higher sexual satisfaction in CSA survivors. These associations are yet to be tested simultaneously in an empirical study.

Research Aims and Hypotheses

This study aimed to examine the role of sexual self-concept (i.e., sexual esteem, sexual preoccupation, and sexual depression) in the relationship between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction among adult CSA survivors. Based on theoretical and empirical assumptions, we hypothesized that: (H 1 ) higher levels of dispositional mindfulness would be associated with greater sexual self-concept (i.e., more sexual self-esteem, and less sexual depression and sexual preoccupation; (H 2 ) greater sexual self-concept would be associated with higher levels of sexual satisfaction; and (H 3 ) dispositional mindfulness would be positively associated with sexual satisfaction through the indirect effect of sexual self-concept. More precisely, we predicted that dispositional mindfulness would be associated with greater sexual self-concept, which in turn would be associated with sexual satisfaction. We also hypothesized that all three dimensions of sexual self-concept would be intercorrelated (H 4 ).

Participants and Procedure

Participants were recruited through social media posts, printed posters, and word of mouth in community organizations intended for CSA survivors. To be eligible, participants had to be at least 18 years old and have had experienced at least one occurrence of CSA as defined by the Criminal Code of Canada (1985); this code refers to any sexual act, with or without contact, between a child under the age of 16 and a person older by five or more years or in a position of authority, with or without the use of physical force or the child’s consent, or any unwanted sexual acts before the age of 18. Participants signed a consent form in which the study’s objectives, procedure, potential risks and benefits, and confidentiality were detailed. Then, they completed an approximately 40-minute survey on a secure website (i.e., Lime Survey). A list of support resources was provided at the end of the questionnaire. This study was approved by the Université du Québec à Montréal’s institutional research ethics board.

The final sample was comprised of 175 participants (60.6% women, 39.4% men) aged between 18 and 70 years ( M  = 41.2, SD  = 13.0) who had experienced CSA. Participants were born in Canada (75.7%), Eastern Europe (22.0%), or the Caribbean (2.3%). They self-identified as heterosexual (73.3%), homosexual (10.8%), bisexual (8.0%) or another sexual orientation (i.e., queer, questioning, asexual; 8.0%). Participants reported being employed (57.4%), students (18.2%), unemployed (7.4%), or having another occupational status (e.g., retired, disabled; 17.0%). They had completed an undergraduate (34.9%), graduate (22.9%), or a college/professional (26.9%) degree, or had a primary or secondary school education (5.4%). Most (45.1%) were single, while 26.9% were in a common-law partnership or cohabiting, 14.0% were married, 12.0% were in a committed, non-cohabiting relationship, and 1.1% were divorced. CSA characteristics are presented in Table 1 .

Childhood Sexual Abuse (CSA) Characteristics.

Note . Cumulative percentage exceeds 100% as participants could report more than one experience of CSA.

Sociodemographic information including age, gender, sexual orientation, birthplace, occupation, education level, and relational status were collected. CSA-related information was also assessed, where participants indicated the types of sexual acts they experienced, their relationship to the abuser(s), and the frequency and duration of the CSA experience(s).

Dispositional Mindfulness

A 5-item French adaptation of the Mindful Attention Awareness Scale (MAAS; Brown & Ryan, 2003 , translated into French by Jermann et al., 2009 ) was used to assess participants’ daily mindfulness dispositions. Participants indicated the frequency at which they experienced or did not experience mindfulness dispositions (e.g., “I find myself doing things without paying attention”) on a 6-point Likert scale ranging from 1 (almost always) to 6 (almost never). Total scores ranged from 5 to 30, with higher scores reflecting higher levels of dispositional mindfulness. The original scale demonstrated good internal reliability in previous samples (α = .89; MacKillop & Anderson, 2007 ). Cronbach’s alpha in the present sample was .88.

A French adaptation of the short version of the Sexuality Scale (SS; Snell & Papini, 1989 ; Wiederman & Allgeier, 1993 ) was used to assess sexual self-concept. For the purpose of this study, the original scale was translated into French using the back-translation method ( Vallerand, 1989 ). This scale is comprised of three 5-item subscales: (1) Sexual esteem (e.g., “I am confident about myself as a sexual partner”); (2) Sexual preoccupation (e.g., “I think about sex more than anything else”), and (3) Sexual depression (e.g., “I feel down about my sex life”). Items are rated on a 5-point Likert scale ranging from 1 (Disagree) to 5 (Agree). Total scores for each subscale ranged from 5 to 25. The original version of this scale showed excellent internal consistency, with Cronbach’s alphas ranging from .90 to .93 ( Snell et al, 1992 ). Cronbach’s alphas ranged from .92 to .94 in the present study.

Sexual Satisfaction

A French version of the Global Measure of Sexual Satisfaction ( Lawrance & Byers, 1995 ; translated into French by Bois et al., 2013 ) was used to assess overall sexual satisfaction, which is comprised of five 7-point bipolar scales: bad–good, unpleasant–pleasant, negative–positive, unsatisfying–satisfying, and worthless–valuable. Total scores ranged from 5 to 35, with higher scores representing greater sexual satisfaction. The original scale showed excellent internal consistency, with Cronbach’s alphas ranging from .95 to .96 ( Byers & Macneil, 2006 ). Cronbach’s alpha was .92 in the present sample.

This study used a cross-sectional design where the sequence of model variables was determined based on theoretical and empirical evidence, suggesting that mindfulness is positively related to childhood trauma survivors’ higher sexual satisfaction (e.g., Godbout et al., 2020 ). This theoretically grounded analytic strategy, often privileged in the trauma literature (e.g., Godbout et al., 2014 ), is commonly recommended for such analyses ( Byrne, 2013 ).

Firstly, descriptive and correlational analyses were performed on the study variables using SPSS version 26. To test the hypothesized integrative model, path analyses were conducted using M plus version 8.4, which accounts for missing data using the Full Information Maximum Likelihood estimation method. In line with many authors’ recommendations (see Hayes & Rockwood, 2017 ; Kline, 2010 ; McDonald & Ho, 2002 ), model fit was tested using the following indices: model χ 2 , χ 2 to degrees of freedom ratio (χ 2 /d f ), Comparative Fit Index (CFI), Standardized Root Mean Square Residual (SRMR), and Root Mean Square Error of Approximation (RMSEA). The model was determined to fit well if most indices met or exceeded generally accepted values. While it is assumed that model χ 2 should be non-significant if the model fits well, relying solely on χ 2 to evaluate model fit is not recommended due to its many limitations ( Brown, 2015 ). According to Kline (2010) , good model fit is obtained when CFI is greater than or equal to 0.9, SRMR is below 0.08, and RMSEA is below or equal to 0.06 ( Kline, 2010 ). Lastly, bootstrap 95% confidence intervals ( Hayes & Rockwood, 2017 ) were conducted in order to test the indirect effect of each sexual self-concept dimension (i.e., sexual esteem, sexual preoccupations, and sexual depression) on the association between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction. This method is robust in cases of non-normal distributions and can minimize measurement error ( Hayes & Rockwood, 2017 ). An indirect effect is considered significant if the resulting bootstrap confidence intervals do not contain zero ( MacKinnon & Fairchild, 2009 ). Standardized direct, specific indirect, total indirect, and total effects were estimated.

Descriptive statistics and correlations are presented in Table 2 . Statistically significant correlations were found between all study variables except for sexual preoccupation, which was only significantly correlated with the other two sexual self-concept dimensions. Correlations were also computed between study variables and sociodemographic characteristics (i.e., age, sex, birthplace, sexual orientation, relationship status). Age and relationship status were the only sociodemographic variables to significantly correlate with sexual satisfaction. They were therefore included as control variables.

Descriptive Statistics and Correlations.

The direct path from dispositional mindfulness to sexual satisfaction was statistically significant (β = .35, SE  = 0.07, 95% CI [0.20, 0.49], p  < .001) and explained 12.4% of the variance in sexual satisfaction. Sexual self-concept dimensions (i.e., sexual self-esteem, sexual preoccupation, and sexual depression) and covariates (i.e., age and relationship status) were then added and tested as an integrative model. Dispositional mindfulness was significantly and positively associated with sexual esteem (β = .24, SE  = 0.07, 95% CI [0.10, 0.38], p  = .001), and negatively associated with sexual depression (β = −.33, SE  = 0.07, 95% CI [–0.47, –0.20], p  < .001). Dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction were not significantly associated with sexual preoccupation (respectively β = –.15, SE  = 0.08, 95% CI [–0.03, 0.01], p  = .06); β = .04, SE  = .05, 95% CI [–0.09, 0.19], p  = .46). As per path analysis recommendations, insignificant paths (i.e., between dispositional mindfulness and sexual preoccupation; between sexual preoccupation and sexual satisfaction) were removed from the final model ( McDonald & Ho, 2002 ). However, as it is an integral part of sexual self-concept, sexual preoccupation was maintained as a covariate.

Path analyses for the integrative model indicated good fit: CFI = 0.994, RMSEA = 0.042, CI [0.000, 0.119], χ 2  = 6.507, p  = .260, χ 2 /d f  = 1.301, SRMR = 0.037. A significant indirect path between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction was found through sexual esteem (β = .11, SE  = 0.04, 95% CI [0.07, 0.27], p  = .002) and sexual depression (β = .12, SE  = 0.03, 95% CI [0.08, 0.26], p  = .001). The direct path from dispositional mindfulness to sexual satisfaction remained significant in the final model (β = .10, SE  = 0.05, 95% CI [0.01, 0.19], p  = .031), suggesting partial mediation. Overall, the model accounted for 66.5% of the variance in sexual satisfaction.

An alternative model that positioned sexual self-concept as an independent variable, dispositional mindfulness as a mediator and sexual satisfaction as a dependent variable, was tested. Results yielded that dispositional mindfulness did not have a significant indirect effect between any of the three dimensions of sexual self-concept and sexual satisfaction. In addition, this alternative model showed a slightly lower fit to the data for all indices (CFI = 0.986, RMSEA = 0.052, CI [0.000, 0.120], χ 2  = 8.849, p  = .182, Ratio χ 2 /d l  = 1.475, SRMR = 0.041) compared to the hypothesized model. Thereby, the hypothesized model seems to offer a better representation of the links between dispositional mindfulness, sexual self-concept, and sexual satisfaction.

The final model including standardized coefficients for significant paths is presented in Figure 1 .

Final model illustrating the indirect effect of sexual esteem and sexual depression on the association between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction.

* p  < .05. ** p  < .01. *** p  < .001.

This study aimed to examine the role of sexual self-concept (i.e., sexual esteem, sexual preoccupation, and sexual depression) in the relationship between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction among adult CSA survivors. Path analyses confirmed the hypothesis of an indirect effect of sexual self-concept on this relationship. Dispositional mindfulness was linked with higher sexual esteem and lower sexual depression, which in turn was associated with greater sexual satisfaction. Two components of sexual self-concept—sexual esteem and sexual depression—were found to act as mechanisms explaining the association between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction. As such, survivors that are more prone to act with awareness during their daily activities may evaluate themselves more positively as sexual partners and feel less depressed when they think about their sexuality; this in turn may lead to overall positive appraisals of their sex lives. The positive association identified between dispositional mindfulness (i.e., focused attention and acting with awareness; Brown & Ryan, 2003 ) and sexual self-concept is a new finding that highlights the importance of sexual self-perceptions in CSA survivors’ sexual satisfaction, and ultimately, in their recovery process. While this avenue has been sparingly addressed in previous studies, this study may contribute to advance trauma research and treatment options for CSA survivors, as its findings support the relevance of mindfulness and sexual self-concept as key intervention targets for the promotion of sexual satisfaction.

The present findings can be interpreted in light of the various mental and emotional processes involved in mindfulness. Notably, anchoring oneself in the present moment and connecting to what is experienced internally can promote greater emotional and cognitive clarity ( Kang et al., 2015 ), especially in trauma survivors. Indeed, children’s bodies are invaded during CSA events, which may be associated with pain and strong emotions such as fear, helplessness, and shame ( Finkelhor & Browne, 1985 ). Thus, survivors may develop coping strategies that dissociate them from the present, their bodies, as well as from thoughts deemed too painful during and after their trauma ( Schimmenti & Caretti, 2016 ). Given the sexual nature of CSA, dissociative coping strategies may spill over into their sex lives (e.g., sexual dissociation; Bird et al., 2014 ). As such, greater mindfulness dispositions may allow CSA survivors to remain engaged and connected with a broader range of emotions ( Berenz et al., 2018 ), while acting as a protective factor against the perpetuation or crystallization of cognitive schemas associated with negative affect ( Smith et al., 2011 ). A greater “tolerance” of distressing emotions may enhance sexual satisfaction, as it can help survivors better cope with factors that negatively affect sexual satisfaction, such as self-criticism, low self-esteem, discomfort with intimacy, and performance anxiety ( del Mar Sánchez-Fuentes et al., 2014 ).

Research has also found dispositional mindfulness to be positively and uniquely related to positive reappraisal (i.e., perceiving stressful events as meaningful to oneself; Garland et al., 2011 ). According to the Mindful Coping Model ( Garland et al., 2009 ), mindfulness can bring a certain detachment from thoughts and emotions, the latter of which can be perceived as ephemeral or transitory. This metacognitive state promotes psychological flexibility and an integrative understanding of past and current stressful events, thereby increasing positive reappraisal that promotes positive affect and well-being following adverse life situations ( Garland et al., 2009 ). Progressively, CSA survivors’ experience of the present moment might become less contaminated by past traumatic sexual experiences (e.g., fewer intrusive memories and related negative thoughts). Thus, mindfulness dispositions may help CSA survivors to evaluate themselves less negatively or rigidly as sexual beings. In turn, mindfulness and the psychological flexibility of one’s sex life may have a positive impact on sexual self-concept (e.g., distancing oneself from social norms regarding sexual performance to promote better sexual esteem; Reese et al., 2010 ). Survivors with more positive sexual self-perceptions may present higher levels of sexual satisfaction, as they may be less likely to define their sexuality solely in light of the negative aspects of their sexual past.

The current findings also offer a possible explanation for the effects of mindfulness, specifically on sexual esteem and sexual depression. When individuals purposely direct their attention to the present moment, they may be more focused on the tasks or activities at hand and allocate fewer cognitive resources to the cultivation of negative thoughts about themselves, such as rumination ( Kang et al., 2015 ). This is particularly important considering that many CSA survivors engage in repetitive negative thinking ( Mansueto et al., 2021 ) and that one’s sexual self-concept can be influenced by past sexual experiences ( Snell & Papini, 1989 ). It is therefore plausible that survivors who are more mindful are also less likely to dwell on distressing or unsatisfying past sexual experiences when they think about or evaluate their sexuality. These survivors are therefore more protected from the integration of negative experiences into their sexual self-concept. Moreover, it is also possible that survivors who are high in dispositional mindfulness are more likely to have responded to the questionnaire items with their present experiences and feelings instead of with their past negative experiences in mind. This would thus result in a more positive evaluation of the sexual self.

The current results parallel those of previous research having found that CSA survivors are more likely to report lower sexual esteem, which can in turn negatively affect their sexual satisfaction ( Barnum & Perrone-McGovern, 2017 ). Further, Heppner and Kernis (2007) postulated that higher levels of mindfulness dispositions could have an effect on self-esteem. Notably, they explained that individuals with “fragile” self-esteem (i.e., unstable, contingent, and discrepant) tend to have feelings of self-worth that are superficially anchored (i.e., derived from superficial and external elements). These individuals can be easily undermined when challenged. In addition, individuals with fragile self-esteem tend to use maladaptive coping strategies (e.g., dissociation, denial), contrary to individuals with more “secure” self-esteem. However, dispositional mindfulness may foster higher levels of “secure” self-esteem and authenticity (i.e., unimpeded functioning of one’s true or core self in daily life; Heppner & Kernis, 2007 ). The notion of authentic self has also been recognized as a mechanism explaining the relationship between mindfulness and psychological well-being ( Chen & Murphy, 2019 ). The present findings offer evidence to support a similar process that may take place in sexuality, where a more integrated and authentic sexual self-concept would promote sexual satisfaction.

The current results have also shown that sexual preoccupation did not have an indirect effect on the association between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction, but that it was significantly associated with sexual esteem. Sexual preoccupation—the tendency to think about sex to an excessive degree ( Snell & Papini, 1989 )—can involve frequent positive thoughts about sexuality (e.g., having fantasies, frequently thinking about pleasurable sexual encounters), or on the contrary, ruminations (e.g., frequently thinking about negative aspects of one’s sexuality). These opposite manifestations of sexual preoccupation could potentially explain its nonsignificant effect on the relationship between dispositional mindfulness and sexual satisfaction.

Finally, descriptive analyses revealed that the present sample of CSA survivors presented similar levels of dispositional mindfulness to those found in community samples of undergraduate students ( Osman et al., 2016 ; Wiederman & Allgeier, 1993 ). However, CSA survivors show relatively higher rates of sexual depression than those found in these samples. The present sample’s high levels of dispositional mindfulness and sexual esteem could reflect survivors’ healing trajectories, suggesting survivors may be coping with their trauma using strategies aimed at managing CSA experiences and associated suffering using dispositional mindfulness, which can in turn foster sexual esteem. Since participants’ mean age was relatively high ( M  = 41.17; SD  = 13.04) and many reported using support services, they may potentially have had the time, opportunities, and tools to metabolize their trauma. However, their high levels of sexual depression may indicate that, despite survivors’ positive adaptation and resilience, sexuality can still be a challenging aspect of their lives, considering the nature of their trauma.

Limitations and Future Research

The current study bears some limitations. First, the study is based on self-reported data, which are prone to social desirability bias, especially considering the sensitive nature of the examined topics (i.e., CSA and sexuality). Second, the cross-sectional design of the study does not allow for causality to be determined between variables in the model. Sexual self-concept may be understood as a process evolving over time, and future studies investigating the links between mindfulness, sexual self-concept, and sexual satisfaction would benefit from a longitudinal design. In addition, since relationship status can influence sexual satisfaction ( Birnie-Porter & Hunt, 2015 ) and that the way individuals perceive themselves can be influenced by their relationship’s dynamic ( Mund et al., 2015 ), it would be relevant to study CSA survivors’ sexual self-concept using a dyadic approach. Third, even though our model explained a substantial proportion of variance in sexual satisfaction, the unexplained variance nonetheless indicates that other variables may explain sexual satisfaction in CSA survivors. It would be relevant to examine other variables related to the sexual self that were not assessed in this study (e.g., sexual consciousness, sexual monitoring). Fourth, although the MAAS questionnaire ( Brown & Ryan, 2003 ) assesses individuals’ focused attention and conscious action in daily life, it does not consider other mindfulness dimensions or particularities of the sexual context. Thus, future studies could test the present model using the Five Facets of Mindfulness Questionnaire ( Baer et al., 2006 ) or the Sexual Mindfulness Measure ( Leavitt et al., 2019 ). Similarly, the short version of the SS has limitations. Notably, as Weiderman and Allgeier (1993) suggested, future studies should confirm the structural validity of this measure. Moreover, although this measure is widely used in studies among adults (e.g. Antičević et al., 2017 ; Pearlman-Avnion et al., 2017 ), it may not capture the complexity of sexual self-concept and does not account for the specificities that CSA survivors may experience (e.g., perceiving oneself as a sexual object). Future studies could thereby document the diverse manifestations of male and female CSA survivors’ sexual self-concept and develop comprehensive measures that reflect their particular reality. Fifth, despite recruitment efforts, the sample did not include enough participants who were born outside of Canada, or from sex and gender minorities. Further study is needed to confirm if the current results might be generalized to adults from cultural, sexual, or gender diversities, given they are more vulnerable to sexual victimization ( Martin-Storey et al., 2018 ) and may experience unique challenges (e.g., minority stress). Similarly, because participants were primarily recruited through community organizations serving CSA survivors, the results are not necessarily representative of those who do not use these services. It is also possible that survivors who avoid discussing CSA experiences or sexuality were less likely to participate in this study. Since this is the reality for many CSA survivors, the results therefore do not represent this entire population. Thus, it would be important to test the present model with larger and more diverse samples and deploy recruitment methods that reach survivors with different sexual and help-seeking trajectories. Lastly, it would be relevant to test the model within a non-victim population or with survivors who endured other types of childhood trauma to test whether the model is specific to CSA survivors. Likewise, it would be beneficial to test the gender invariance of such a model using a larger sample.

Implications for Practice

These empirical findings support the relevance of mindfulness-based interventions aimed at improving CSA survivors’ sexual satisfaction. Such interventions could focus on the development of knowledge and skills involved in mindfulness, such as focused attention, acting with awareness, self-regulation, and detachment. In particular, mindfulness and the detachment it can foster may help survivors understand that their CSA experiences, while being a source of suffering and negative outcomes in their lives, do not define their sexual self.

The current findings also support the importance of inviting survivors to reflect on their sexual self, such as on one’s needs, desires, and values, in order to better understand themselves as sexual beings and partners (i.e., sexual self-concept). As such, survivors could benefit from experiencing their sexuality more authentically and detached from previous traumatic experiences. Deconstructing what belongs to the aftermath of CSA and what defines survivors’ identities could also potentially contribute to the building of a more coherent, positive, and holistic sexual self. Likewise, increasing awareness of the negative emotions that may have been embedded in survivors’ sexual self-concept as a result of CSA (e.g., depressive thoughts about sexuality, a perception of oneself as a bad sexual partner) can foster a better understanding of how these emotions can influence survivors’ behaviors, cognitions, and sexual satisfaction. This study emphasizes the need for intervention aimed at developing survivors’ sexual esteem to promote a more satisfying sex life (e.g., reflection exercises on what is an adequate sexual partner or sexuality, sexual self-discovery, and appraisal of oneself as a valuable sexual partner). As these interventions are likely to revive painful emotions and flashbacks related to CSA, it is important to ground them in a secure context guided by a trauma-sensitive approach. Working with the window of tolerance (model of autonomic arousal; Siegel, 1999 ), practitioners could improve survivors’ metabolization of their trauma while tolerating and remaining attentive to the unpleasant emotions that emerge. At the same time, practitioners can ensure that survivors do not become emotionally dysregulated or re-traumatized by teaching survivors to identify psychological and physical cues that may indicate they are no longer within their window of tolerance and supporting emotion regulation skills, which can also be useful in sexual contexts.

Previous studies have documented the positive effects of mindfulness on individuals’ sexuality. However, mindfulness’s effects on CSA survivors’ sexual satisfaction remain little investigated. The present study found that sexual self-concept, and more specifically, its sexual esteem and sexual depression dimensions, do act as explanatory mechanisms. These findings support survivors’ sexual empowerment and suggest that having a fulfilling sex life is possible despite traumatic experiences. Nevertheless, further research is needed to understand the complex interplay between mindfulness and sexual self-concept. A better understanding of how mindfulness can promote greater sexual self-concept would ultimately contribute to treatment options’ effectiveness and ultimately, survivors’ recovery.

Acknowledgments

A special thanks to the survivors who participated in this project and the community services that were involved.

Author Biographies

Roxanne Guyon , is a PhD student in sexology at the University of Quebec at Montreal. Her research is focused on relational and sexual functioning of child sexual abuse survivors as well as their recovery and resilience processes.

Mylène Fernet , PhD, is a professor in the department of sexology at the University of Quebec at Montreal. Her research is focused on interpersonal and sexual violence in both youth and adults as well as women’s sexuality from a prevention and health promotion perspective.

Marianne Girard , is a PhD student in sexology at the University of Quebec at Montreal. Her research is focused on the impact of childhood sexual abuse on survivors’ adjustment regarding domestic violence, mental health problems and sexuality.

Marie-Marthe Cousineau , PhD, is a professor in the School of Criminology at University of Montreal. Her research is focused on life trajectories of victimized women as well as in penal policies and practices.

Monique Tardif , PhD, is a professor in the department of sexology at the University of Quebec at Montreal and also a therapist. Her research is focused on childhood sexual abuse, particularly from the perspective of the adolescent perpetrator and their families.

Natacha Godbout , PhD, is a professor in the department of sexology at the University of Quebec at Montreal and also a therapist. Her research is focused on the impacts of relational trauma on sexual, psychological and relational functioning in adulthood.

The author(s) declared no potential conflicts of interests with respect to the authorship and/or publication of this article.

Funding: The author(s) disclosed receipt of the following financial support for the research and/or authorship of this article: This research was supported by a grant from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council (#430-2016-00951) awarded to Mylène Fernet and by a scholarship from the Fonds de Recherche du Québec—Société et Culture (#2022-B2Z-297045) and the Social Science and Humanities Research Council of Canada (#752-2021-2334) awarded to Roxanne Guyon.

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It's Been 37 Years Since My Rape. The Shame Still Haunts Me

Editors note : The author of this essay is a 52-year-old Massachusetts woman. We've granted her request for anonymity because of the personal and painful nature of its content. We also believe her desire to remain anonymous, nearly 40 years after she was assaulted, says something powerful about the effect this experience has had on her life.

In March 2013, I published an  anonymous essay  about being sexually assaulted by five male classmates in 1981 when we were 15 years old. I was moved to write that essay because I was so angry about the way a teenage sexual assault victim from Steubenville, Ohio was being publicly vilified for drinking alcohol and passing out, which a group of boys then viciously took advantage of. The incident, including the victim’s clear incapacity, had been captured on video, which was probably the only reason the two rapists were held to account. My heart broke for the teenager who was being doubly victimized. First, she was sexually violated. Then, she was blamed in the  national media for somehow “allowing” or even “encouraging” the rape to happen.

As sickened as I was by the incident, I only agreed to publish that article with the understanding that my identity would be kept private. I didn’t want my teenage sons to know what had happened to me. I didn’t want my current circle of friends to know about that part of my past.

I still don’t want my identity revealed. Even now, as women across the country step forward to share their #MeToo stories. And even as Dr. Christine Blasey Ford, Deborah Ramirez and Julie Swetnick bring allegations of sexual misconduct against Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh.

Keeping a “secret” is part of what is so damaging about sexual assault. It festers inside of you, allowing the shame to grow.

I don’t want to spend emotional energy discussing and reliving that awful part of my life with each friend or loved one who reads this essay. I also don’t want to risk the professional reputation I’ve worked years to build on the off-chance that someone I know — or who finds me on the internet — decides to harass me. I particularly fear harassment or humiliation aimed at my boys or my husband.

It’s true that almost 40 years after that incident and its aftermath, I still feel shame. It embarrasses me to discuss, or even to think about, the degrading details of my assault:

How I was new to town; how a popular boy I vaguely knew, “John,” called to see if he and four friends could come over to my house one Saturday night when my parents weren’t home; how we watched TV for a while with my younger brother before going into the living room to talk; how one boy asked if they could see what my bedroom looked like; how we talked in my room for a few minutes until John said, “one, two, three” and they all jumped on top of me and started tearing off my clothes; how I struggled and yelled to John to get everyone off me; how he said he would — as long as I would let each boy have a turn; how I agreed — I didn't know what else to do; how before that night, I had only kissed one boy, after he had been my boyfriend for several months; how I arrived at school the next Monday to everyone laughing at me and calling me a slut; how I had to endure three more years at that high school before applying to a college across the country and never looking back.

As a 15-year-old, I was confused, overwhelmed, devastated, alone. The adults in my life didn’t ask what had happened after my behavior markedly changed or ask how they could help, maybe thinking it was just normal teenage angst. I was naïve in not knowing how to ask them for the help I so desperately needed.

Keeping a “secret” is part of what is so damaging about sexual assault. It festers inside of you, allowing the shame to grow. Since you don’t have anyone else to act as a sounding board, you’re at the mercy of your own crazy repeating thoughts — replaying the incident over and over, wishing you had done some little thing differently in the hope that the assault could have been avoided. Additionally, you will do almost anything to make sure the secret won’t be revealed, which can make the initial situation even more damaging. You engage in self-destructive behaviors to blot the pain or to subconsciously punish yourself. Your self-esteem plummets. You think you are unlovable, dirty and bad.

I didn’t even know the concept of “rape” before it happened to me, so how was I supposed to know these seemingly cool boys were plotting something so evil?

Eventually, through therapy, I was able to understand that my behavior didn’t cause the assault — John’s did. Sure, I let them come over to my house when my parents weren’t home, because I was excited to hang out with boys who apparently wanted to spend time getting to know me. No alarm bells went off when one of them asked to see my bedroom. I had neat things in my room to look at, and the white desk where I studied was there, so I didn’t think of it as just the place where my bed was. I didn’t even know the concept of “rape” before it happened to me, so how was I supposed to know these seemingly cool boys were plotting something so evil? My fervent hope is that the #MeToo movement has educated potential victims so they will be more psychologically prepared to thwart an attack than I was.

No alcohol was involved when I was raped, though women are often blamed for their assaults if they have been drinking ( our president said so just this week): as if there is an equivalency between voluntarily drinking alcohol and being sexually violated against your will. I don’t understand why this only happens to rape victims. For instance, in 2017 several male college students tragically died after being hazed by their prospective fraternities . No one blamed those victims for drinking too much alcohol or for putting themselves in a situation where others could easily take advantage of them. The blame rested squarely where it should have: on the aggressors.

I marvel at the strength of Blasey Ford, Ramirez and Swetnick, for coming forward — in front of the entire world — to describe the degradation and violence they say they suffered 35 years ago. They know, like me and so many other victims, that they will be blamed for the disgusting, criminal behavior they were subjected to. They will also be blamed for ruining Kavanaugh’s career (or at least his character) as if his alleged deeds themselves weren’t the disqualifying factor.

Regardless of Kavanaugh’s fate, their bravery moves us another step up the ladder towards a fuller understanding of why we must #BelieveSurvivors. I thank them for that.

• Also by this author: My Own Personal Steubenville: Reflections On My High School Rape
• Janna Malamud Smith: I Stand With Christine Blasey Ford. Do You?
• Susan E. Gallagher: Kavanaugh’s Fate Isn’t The Only Thing At Stake

More from WBUR

Who Am I Essay: Writing Tips and Sample

Your “Who am I?” essay is a paper where you describe yourself as a person. Mention what inspires and motivates you, what you love and don’t love, your goals and wishes, etc.

In this article, you’ll learn how to write this personal essay. (And please don’t miss a ready-made example to understand what to describe in your work!)

How to Write a “Who Am I” Essay

You’re that person who knows you best, but writing about yourself is still challenging:

You read a writing prompt for a college application or scholarship , and you aren’t sure if you understand it in detail. How do you know what exactly to mention in your essay? You can’t find words to describe your nature and skills. How do you know if that particular accomplishment or story from your life is worth including?

Stick with us here for practical tips on writing a “Who Am I” essay, with a free template to follow.

How to start?

Ask any writer, and they will tell you that the hardest part of the writing process is to start it. It’s a kind of writer’s block when you stare at a blank screen and don’t know what to write. Below are several ideas that can help you craft a compelling essay about yourself:

• Think about one sentence that would describe you best. (A technique some authors use for inspiration: Answer the question, “What would friends write on your grave?” or “What do you want the world to remember about you?” You can start an essay with that phrase.
• In the introduction, describe yourself in general . (Be truthful and honest.)
• Discuss one or two of your hobbies. (Choose those you’re most passionate about, those influencing your mood — and maybe your skills — most.)
•   Highlight your achievements but don’t boast. ( Be reflective by analyzing and evaluating what you’ve achieved.)
• Add some personality to the essay. (Tell anecdotes, include examples, and be creative to keep readers engaged with your story.)

Short Essay About “Who I Am” Sample

You’re welcome to use the below template from our professional writer for crafting your future “Who am I” essays. Here it goes:

Actionable Tips to Improve Your Paper

Ready to start writing? Consider these helpful tips on crafting a person essay about who I am:

1) Understand your audience

Who will read your essay? Is it a college admission officer who knows nothing about you? Or, maybe it’s your school teacher with some background of who you are? Do you plan to publish your reflection for your social media followers or blog readers?

Depending on the audience, your story may change. Add details about what interests your readers: What would they want to know? Understanding your readers will make your essay more compelling (1). It will be easier for you to engage them and make them emotionally connected to your story.

2) Don’t be afraid to look vulnerable

Allow the readers to see your inner feelings. Sincerity and reflection are the new black, you know. It’s okay to speak about your strengths, weaknesses, or worries to the audience. That’s what differentiates you from other people, thus making you an individual.

Here’s the big secret:

Admission committees appreciate students’ understanding of their weaknesses and areas to grow. Communicate the willingness to change and grow. You’re just a human, after all.

Write about what you want to develop in yourself. Or, tell about life experiences that have changed or influenced you most.

3) Proofread and edit your essay

Once your essay is ready, it’s time to proofread and edit it. Here’s a short checklist of the details to fix if any:

• Grammar and punctuation mistakes (verb tenses, sentence structure)
• Spelling errors and inconsistencies in names or terms
• Incorrect capitalization
• No logical flow or transitions between paragraphs
• Excessive wordiness and repetition
• Biased language
• Too much passive voice and redundant adverbs
• Too sophisticated words and phrases that have simpler alternatives

That’s It: Your “Who Am I” Essay Is Ready

In this blog post, we tried to cover all the core details of personal essay writing. Now you know how to start it, what elements to include, and how to craft it for better readability and emotional connection with the audience.

We hope our 500-word essay example will help you write your perfect story about yourself. If you still have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask our professional writers for help.

References:

• https://summer.harvard.edu/blog/12-strategies-to-writing-the-perfect-college-essay/
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Essay Samples on Who Am I

What makes me who i am: understanding the self.

What makes me who I am? This question delves into the intricate web of experiences, beliefs, values, and influences that shape the essence of my identity. As I navigate the journey of life, the interplay of my heritage, relationships, personal choices, and aspirations weaves together...

How to Answer "Who Am I?": the Omportance of Self-reflection

The question "Who am I?" is a profound inquiry that invites us to explore our identity, values, and beliefs. While this question may seem simple, its complexity lies in the intricate interplay of our experiences, emotions, and perceptions. Answering "Who am I?" requires introspection, self-discovery,...

• About Myself

Exploring What Makes Me Different From Others

What makes you different from others? This question invites introspection into the distinctive qualities, experiences, and perspectives that shape my identity. In a world marked by diversity, each person possesses a unique combination of traits that sets them apart. This essay will delve into the...

Exploring What Makes You Who You Are

Have you ever stopped to ponder what makes you the unique individual you are? From your beliefs and experiences to your personality and values, the factors that shape your identity are complex and multifaceted. This essay delves into the intriguing question of what makes you...

Describe Yourself: My Journey of Self-Discovery and Self-Reflection

Personality is never easily defined. Many people have a hard time describing what they are. They like to think that they have all of these 'perfect' traits, but each one has advantages and disadvantages. Thankfully, personality psychology exists to help. Through various theories and many...

• Personality

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Life in a Mixtape: Describing Yourself Through Songs

In this essay about yourself I will be introducing you to a playlist of songs that represent me leaving and coming back to Humboldt County. The songs I will be showing you to introduce some of my life are, Home by Phillip Phillips, Gravity by...

All About Me: Re-Descovering Personality and Traits

By taking this course I read lots of 'All about me' essay examples. Also I did many different self-assessments to know myself better. I will firstly give an overview on those results. Based on Self-assessment Personality Inventory, my personality type involves introversion, sensing, feeling and...

How to Define Yourself by Chuck Clifton Book Analysis

Who are you? How do you define yourself? These are the questions How to Define Yourself answers using the Stimulus-Space of Time-Response model. Throughout the book, we learn to become better versions of ourselves by Predefining ourselves and carrying out these definitions to Define yourself...

• Being Yourself

Beneath The Layers: Personal Description

When I first got this assignment, I was at a loss as to how to proceed with it. However, as I began to internalize it, I realized that it’s an opportunity to get to know myself better. I look upon this as an opportunity to...

Personal Evaluation: Learning From Struggles

Who am I? Such a simple question to ask but such a profoundly tricky question to answer. Sometimes a person may feel that they have no purpose in life and don’t really know who they truly are. Discovering who you are just takes the time...

An Individual's Thoughts on Self-Discovery

The question is who am I? How do you answer that question when really you don’t know who you are yet? All I know is that I’m Andrea Spencer, a 20 year old adult just trying to figure herself out. Each day I get to...

An Independent Report on Life-Changing Events

Who am I? Can any person tell me who am I just from my name? Can person tell me from reading a background check on my life, what kind of woman I’m going to develop into? I can be a scientist, lawyer, cartoonist, actress or...

• Family Relationships

Examining Socrates Arguments on the Impact of the Physical Appearance

"Who am I? Socrates once said that the unexamined life is not worth living. You have to figure out who you are by finding the principles that lie within you. Once you find those principles, you have to live your life by those principles. Before...

• Physical Appearance

Best topics on Who Am I

1. What Makes Me Who I Am: Understanding the Self

2. How to Answer “Who Am I?”: the Omportance of Self-reflection

3. Exploring What Makes Me Different From Others

4. Exploring What Makes You Who You Are

5. Describe Yourself: My Journey of Self-Discovery and Self-Reflection

6. Life in a Mixtape: Describing Yourself Through Songs

7. All About Me: Re-Descovering Personality and Traits

8. How to Define Yourself by Chuck Clifton Book Analysis

9. Beneath The Layers: Personal Description

10. Personal Evaluation: Learning From Struggles

11. An Individual’s Thoughts on Self-Discovery

12. An Independent Report on Life-Changing Events

13. Examining Socrates Arguments on the Impact of the Physical Appearance

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Sample Essays on “Who Am I?” How to guide, with Outlines

Published by gudwriter on November 23, 2017 November 23, 2017

How to Write an Essay About Yourself

Many students, from high school to college level, do not know how to describe themselves. They mix up ideas as they do not really know what they need to include in their writing. The main aim of a who am I essay is to make the reader understand who you are and what you believe in. Remember, the essay doesn’t have to be always about the positive side- you can include your weak points as well in a creative way. You can also write about what makes you unique (unique skills, character, etc). If you need help, college admission essay writing services is available to assist you.

Elevate Your Writing with Our Free Writing Tools!

Did you know that we provide a free essay and speech generator, plagiarism checker, summarizer, paraphraser, and other writing tools for free?

Striking the balance makes your essay realistic and convincing.

Character : What are your character traits? Which habits define you?

Values : What is your value system? Here, you need to include things that inspire you. It is here that you state your beliefs, motivations, principles, and inspirations. The reader expects you to have either staunch stands on certain things and this is the part where you make them know. Do not highlight radical points, though.

Skills : What aptitudes do you have? And, what is the level in each skill? This may include communication, computer, education, languages, leadership, or anything else you find worthy.

Achievements :

Life experiences that influenced your life

Perhaps you would like to read an essay sample on what makes you unique ?

Who Am I Essay Example 1 Outline

Below is a layout you should follow when writing a personal essay to impress your professor.

• Hook – The Question – who am I?
• Brief summary: Well, I know quite much about myself: I am a social, kind, respectful, and principled young man.
• Thesis : I am a kind, friendly, respectful, and principled young person.
• Point : Social
• Illustration : Meeting new friends
• Logic : Makes me dynamic
• Thesis relation: A cheerful, social and accommodative person is how many people know me.
• Point : Respectful and law abiding
• Illustration : Want to get along with everyone- both juniors and seniors. Car seats, polite character
• Explanation : I know the limits
• Thesis relation : Every day, I want to be known as a person who is respectful even to those who least deserve it.
• Point : Hobbies
• Illustrations : Sports, chess, music
• Explanation : Clear my mind, get healthier.
• Thesis relation : Sportsmanship has taught me to be fair other people, diligent and focused.
• Point : I am not perfect- when I don’t hit my targets, obvious opposition from people who don’t love progress. My love for novelty makes me uncomfortable with normal rules.
• Illustrations : My mum says I am selfish and that I always want everything to go my way. Yet, I’m still the person you will find in doing voluntary community work to help people.
• Explanation : I guess my self-esteem is too high for people to put down. This rubs feathers with people who stand my path to success.
• Thesis relation : I’d be a liar to say I am a genius, flawless or immortal- and that’s who I am.
• Restatement of thesis
• Summary of essay
• Signing out

Easily create engaging speeches that will express yourself confidently and fluently, all thanks to our innovative free speech writer generator .

Who Am I Essay Example 1

Who am I? Describing oneself is one of the most complicated tasks. In most cases, we always define ourselves using institutions, other people, or activities. Well, I know quite much about myself: I am a kind, friendly, respectful, and principled young person.

First, I am a sociable person. I love to meet people and make new friends. It’s not that I am an extrovert. However, I always work towards getting along with people. Of course, there are times I enjoy being alone for meditation . However, being around people makes me feel comfortable. I like to utilize every chance I get to make new friends. Interacting with people from different parts of the world makes me a diverse person. I am one of those people who believe that there is richness in human diversity. I am not quite selective of who I socialize with. A cheerful, cordial, and accommodative person is how many people know me.

Second, I am kind and respectful. Well, I appreciate that there is a thin line between being social and respectful. I want to treat everyone – junior or senior- with utmost reverence. In this regard, I am quite a listener. This didn’t start yesterday- I have always loved to give up my seats to elders in the train since I was young. Again, I am firm and at the same time polite. I love to make my points in a way that won’t hurt those around me. I always desire to be respectful even to those who least deserve it. Being respectful does not subtract anything from me after all.

Third, I have a great affection to team play. Well, I probably got this trait from my life as a sportsperson. I have been a school captain in Team Handball and Badminton. Today, I still participate in these games as a coach. I’m adherent to chess and I could become a grandmaster in the next few months. Sports and competitions have trained me to be fair, diligent, hardworking, and focused. As my hobby, chess clears my mind while athletics make me healthy. I’d definitely not tell who I am without mentioning sportsmanship. Actually, sports largely define me.

I am not perfect, though. I can be moody when I don’t hit my targets. My love for novelty makes me uncomfortable with normal rules. My mum says I am selfish and that I always want everything to go my way. Yet, I’m still the person you will find doing voluntary community work to help people. I guess my self-esteem is too high for people to put down. This rubs feathers with anyone who stands on the path to success. I’d be a liar if I said that I am a genius, flawless or immortal- and that’s who I am.

Anyway, it may be a little difficult to explain who I am. However, there are qualities that are an outright depiction of me. Respect, principles, sportsmanship, and leadership are some of them. As a quick learner, I love to change every behavior that doesn’t make me a better person. The desire to be good to everybody has made me who I am today and I intend to keep it that way.

Personal Essay Example 2 Outline

Introduction.

I give a description of myself in relation to my family background, personality, and how I view life.

Paragraph 1:

Family background

• Revolves around strong Christian faith since my parents are staunch Roman Catholic faithful
• I was born in Chicago, Illinois 21 years ago and I am the third born in a family of four children.
• I am a female of African American origin and I am very proud of my cultural background and family values

Paragraph 2:

My personality

• I am outspoken and like socializing and making new friends
• I value respect and believe it is two way
• I am hard working

Paragraph 3:

My view of life

• All humans are equal regardless of their cultural, racial and religious backgrounds as well as gender
• I am liberal in that I am open to learning new things such as new cultures, religions, and even languages
• Divergent views should be tolerated

I can summarize myself as someone who is respectful, accommodating, and open minded. I appreciate that as a human, I need others for my life to be complete. I believe my personality and world views are matching and thus I find life more sociable and interesting.

Personal Essay Example 2

My family background revolves around strong Christian faith since my parents are staunch Roman Catholic faithful. I was born in Chicago, Illinois 21 years ago and I am the third born in a family of four children. I am a female of African-American origin and I am very proud of my cultural background and family values. Like my parents, I have developed the habit and routine of going to church every Sunday in line with Christian doctrines. As a matter of fact, all the members of my family value attending Sunday masses wherever they may find themselves. I grew up in a working-parents family and I have grown to live in harmony with my siblings.

Regarding my personality, I am one person who is outspoken and likes socializing and making new friends. The number of friends I have in college is uncountable because I have no boundaries when it comes to building relationships. That notwithstanding, I value respect and believe it is two way. I expect that anybody I interact with should show me the same level of respect I show them irrespective of their background or status in the society. I am hard working because my parents taught me to loathe laziness since it is the beginning of poverty and miserable life. To me, respect and hard work go hand in hand. Working hard respectfully has opened many doors for me so far in my life.

My view of life is that all humans are equal regardless of their cultural, racial, and religious backgrounds as well as gender. This is why I have friends whose cultural and other backgrounds are diverse. I am also liberal in that I am open to learning new things such as new cultures, religions, and even languages. For instance, I can speak fluent French and Spanish yet I am American. I also believe that divergent views should be tolerated because this is part of enhancing human diversity. My parents had once tried to stop me from being too open minded but I persisted with it. Being open to new things, in my view, amounts to being accommodative to human diversity.

In conclusion, I can summarize myself as someone who is respectful, accommodative, and open minded. I appreciate that as a human, I need others for my life to be complete. When I show that I care for and accommodate different views, I find it easy working with others. I have thus managed to evade suffering any form of racial or cultural profiling because people find me easy to deal with. I believe my personality and world views are matching and thus I find life more sociable and interesting. It is my intention to continue leading this fulfilling life.

Ready to pay to write essay ? We offer a legit service that thousands of students are making use of everyday. Let us do the hard work so you can have some much deserved fun. Order now and receive a quality paper on time.

Personal Essay Sample 3 Outline

I am a faithful Christian who is open-minded, friendly, and action-oriented.

Paragraph1:

In spite of being a staunch Christian, I am open to other people’s ways of worship and generally to other people’s way of life and opinions.

• I can listen to and understand what other people say and treat it as their opinion to which they are entitled whether or not I agree with it.
• I am able to live amongst people of various cultures.
• However, I do not let other people’s views or cultures affect my own.

I am a friendly person who highly values friendship.

• I have the habit of forming strong friendships both in our neighborhood and at school.
• I have quite a number of friends from various backgrounds because I do not choose friends based on their cultural backgrounds.
• I believe in genuine friendship and as soon as I detect that one is not a true friend, I drop them.

I follow my decisions and promises with actions as I believe that it is through actions that one can solve their problems and meet their life goals.

• I keep to my decisions once I make them.
• I have been able to accomplish many of my life’s endeavors especially in my academic life.
• I also know that keeping promises is one of the best ways of keeping relationships alive and healthy.
• I normally do all it takes to keep a promise irrespective of who I make it to.

I am an open-minded Christian who values relationships and I act on my decisions and promises. I am accommodative to diverse views and opinions even when they sharply contrast with mine. I pursue my life goals and keep relationships through action.

Personal Essay Sample 3

As a person, I feel growing over the years has significantly changed who I am. I have had to see and experience many things that I did not get to see in my childhood. I have also met many different people and visited many places. Some of the perspectives I held about people and certain things have certainly changed. In addition, I have undergone significant personal growth which has seen my personality transform as well. I have also become more decisive in my actions and in my relationships with others. I am a faithful Christian who is open-minded, friendly, and action-oriented.

In spite of being a staunch Christian, I am open to other people’s ways of worship and generally to other people’s way of life and opinions. I can listen to and understand what other people say and treat it as their opinion to which they are entitled whether or not I agree with it. This way, I have been able to learn a lot from others and widen my view of life and humanity. I am also able to live amongst people of various cultures. However, I do not let other people’s views or cultures affect my own as much as I may be accommodative to them. This is because I believe that the world has enough space for everyone to practice their own cultures and share their opinions without interfering with others.

I am also a friendly person who highly values friendship. From my childhood, I developed the habit of forming strong friendships both in our neighborhood and at school. I have carried this habit to my adulthood and I have quite a number of friends from various backgrounds because I do not choose friends based on their cultural backgrounds. However, I believe in genuine friendship and as soon as I detect that one is not a true friend, I drop them. To me, a friend should be like family that is always there for one in their better and tough days and moments. Out of this belief, I have helped a number of friends both in and out of school and shared with them some of my innermost secrets. I too have benefited from the loyalty of these friendships.

Further, I follow my decisions and promises with actions as I believe that it is through actions that one can solve their problems and meet their life goals. This virtue has helped me accomplish many of my life’s endeavors especially in my academic life. For example, since my middle school level, I decided that I would not consume television content during examination periods but maximally concentrate on the exams. I have kept to this decision and have thus posted good grades all through because I always have enough time to prepare for exams. I also know that keeping promises is one of the best ways of keeping relationships alive and healthy. I normally do all it takes to keep a promise irrespective of who I make it to. I do keep even as simple a promise as that of sharpening my younger sister’s drawing pencil every morning before she goes to school.

I am an open-minded Christian who values relationships and I act on my decisions and promises. I am accommodative to diverse views and opinions even when they sharply contrast with mine. I pursue my life goals and keep relationships through action. I also have many friends since I believe that genuine friendship is highly beneficial to humans. This personality and values enable me to live a fulfilling life as I am capable of accomplishing my goals and at the same time live harmoniously with others.

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Essay on Who Am I for Students and Children

500+ words essay on who am i.

In this world, many people surround us. Though we all apparently look similar, yet we all are unique in our own ways. The uniqueness gives us an identity. I am a teenage girl. I am like most teenage girls but I am also different from others. Those differences make me who I am.

I am a girl in mid-teenage. From childhood, I always loved to interact with people. I like to know people and make friends. I am a social person and go out with my friends and family. Also, I like to visit new places. Nature attracts me. Therefore, whenever I get the vacation I always insist on my friends and family for a getaway in nature’s lap.

Travelling gives me immense pleasure. I always capture beautiful moments and places in my camera. Whenever I am sad, I revisit my photo album to look at the beautiful places and moments. The thought of those happy moments and beautiful places makes me happy.

I am serious and disciplined about my studies and read many books other than my textbooks. Reading autobiographies and detective storybooks are what I like. I am involved in extra curriculum activities. I am learning music and love to sing.

Also, I listen to all genres of music but Hindustani classical , semi-classical, Bollywood songs are my favorite. Melodious songs are close to my heart. I always participate in musical and cultural events organized in my school. I also take part in the inter-school competition and have been a winner at an inter-school competition a couple of times. Those are cherishable and proud moments of my life.

Every person is a mix of good and bad qualities. I am not an early riser by nature. I understand that waking up early is very important to become productive. Still, during my holidays I take the liberty of waking up late.

I am an ambitious person and a dreamer. My dream is to become a teacher. I think a teacher is a big motivator and guide. I would like to motivate people and guide them to do good for society.

Get the huge list of more than 500 Essay Topics and Ideas

Me in several roles

While growing up I have realized that I am an individual but I play several roles throughout the day. As per these roles, my behavior and attitude keep altering. This variation adds various shades in my personality.

In my home firstly, I am a daughter. I try to listen and follow what my parents teach me. When I do well in studies, they become proud. Yet when I do not obey them, they scold me. I get lots of love, care and attention from my parents.  I also care, love, and respect them. My parents are my first identity in this world.

Secondly, I am a sister. I have an elder brother. He takes care of me and guides to follow the path to success. My brother is also my friend. We spend quality time together playing, laughing at jokes together, and watching our favorite cartoon shows. The love, care, the fight makes a beautiful bond between us.

Thirdly, I am a student. Our teachers always try to guide us to realize our path of life. They want us to be sincere in studies and build a successful career . They also instill in us the values of a good human being. I try to be a sincere and obedient student and always do my homework and do well in studies. I also respect my teachers and am an obedient student. My teachers are patient and they always guide me to overcome my mistakes.

Fourthly, the role that we all love is that of a friend. I have many friends. I love moving out and spending time with my friends. We help each other in times of need. We live happy moments together. Friendship is very beautiful. I love to make my friends feel special, and never miss wishing them on their birthdays.

Conclusion             

Life is full of experiences. Every moment we meet different people and face different situations. In this course of life, we not only get to know different people, but we also get to know ourselves in different ways.

As we grow, our likes dislike interest changes. Our perception and outlook toward life also change with time and experience. Thus, the search to the answer to the question of who I am is a lifelong process.

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What happened in the Kolkata rape case that triggered doctors’ protests?

Activists and doctors in India demand better safeguarding of women and medical professionals after a trainee medic was raped and murdered in Kolkata.

Activists and doctors across India continued to protest on Wednesday to demand justice for a female doctor, who was raped and murdered while on duty in a hospital in the eastern city of Kolkata.

Feminist groups rallied on the streets in protests titled “Reclaim the Night” in Kolkata overnight on Wednesday – on the eve of India’s independence day – in solidarity with the victim, demanding the principal of RG Kar Medical College resign. Some feminist protesters also marched well beyond Kolkata, including in the capital Delhi.

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While the protests were largely peaceful, a small mob of men stormed the medical college and vandalised property. This group was dispersed by the police.

This comes after two days of nationwide protests by doctors following the incident at RG Kar Medical College in West Bengal’s capital city. “Sit-in demonstrations and agitation in the hospital campus will continue,” one of the protesting doctors, identified as Dr Mridul, told Al Jazeera.

Services in some medical centres were halted indefinitely, and marches and vigils shed light on issues of sexual violence, as well as doctors’ safety in the world’s most populous nation.

What happened to the doctor in Kolkata?

A 31-year-old trainee doctor’s dead body, bearing multiple injuries, was found on August 9 in a government teaching hospital in Kolkata.

The parents of the victim were initially told “by hospital authorities that their daughter had committed suicide,” lawyer and women’s rights activist Vrinda Grover told Al Jazeera. But an autopsy confirmed that the victim was raped and killed.

Grover has appeared for victims in sexual violence cases in India in the past, including Bilkis Bano , a Muslim woman who was gang-raped during the 2002 Gujarat riots, and Soni Sori, a tribal activist based in Chhattisgarh state.

Thousands of doctors marched in Kolkata on Monday, demanding better security measures and justice for the victim.

On Tuesday, the Kolkata High Court transferred the case to the Central Bureau of Investigation (CBI).

The Federation of Resident Doctors Association (FORDA) called for a nationwide halting of elective services in hospitals starting on Monday. Elective services are medical treatments that can be deferred or are not deemed medically necessary.

On Tuesday, FORDA announced on its X account that it is calling off the strike after Health Minister Jagat Prakash Nadda accepted protest demands.

One of these demands was solidifying the Central Protection Act, intended to be a central law to protect medical professionals from violence, which was proposed in the parliament’s lower house in 2022, but has not yet been enacted.

FORDA said that the ministry would begin working on the Act within 15 days of the news release, and that a written statement from the ministry was expected to be released soon.

Press release regarding call off of strike. In our fight for the sad incident at R G Kar, the demands raised by us have been met in full by the @OfficeofJPNadda , with concrete steps in place, and not just verbal assurances. Central Healthcare Protection Act ratification… pic.twitter.com/OXdSZgM1Jc — FORDA INDIA (@FordaIndia) August 13, 2024

Why are some Indian doctors continuing to protest?

However, other doctors’ federations and hospitals have said they will not back down on the strike until a concrete solution is found, including a central law to curb attacks on doctors.

Those continuing to strike included the Federation of All India Medical Associations (FAIMA), Delhi-based All India Institute Of Medical Sciences (AIIMS) and Indira Gandhi Hospital, local media reported.

Ragunandan Dixit, the general secretary of the AIIMS Resident Doctors’ Association, said that the indefinite strike will continue until their demands are met, including a written guarantee of the implementation of the Central Protection Act.

Medical professionals in India want a central law that makes violence against doctors a non-bailable, punishable offence, in hopes that it deters such violent crimes against doctors in the future.

Those continuing to protest also call for the dismissal of the principal of the college, who was transferred. “We’re demanding his termination, not just transfer,” Dr Abdul Waqim Khan, a protesting doctor told ANI news agency. “We’re also demanding a death penalty for the criminal,” he added.

“Calling off the strike now would mean that female resident doctors might never receive justice,” Dr Dhruv Chauhan, member of the National Council of the Indian Medical Association’s Junior Doctors’ Network told local news agency Press Trust of India (PTI).

Which states in India saw doctors’ protests?

While the protests started in West Bengal’s Kolkata on Monday, they spread across the country on Tuesday.

The capital New Delhi, union territory Chandigarh, Uttar Pradesh capital Lucknow and city Prayagraj, Bihar capital Patna and southern state Goa also saw doctors’ protests.

Who is the suspect in the Kolkata rape case?

Local media reported that the police arrested suspect Sanjoy Roy, a civic volunteer who would visit the hospital often. He has unrestricted access to the ward and the police found compelling evidence against him.

The parents of the victim told the court that they suspect that it was a case of gang rape, local media reported.

Why is sexual violence on the rise in India?

Sexual violence is rampant in India, where 90 rapes were reported on average every day in 2022.

Laws against sexual violence were made stricter following a rape case in 2012, when a 22-year-old physiotherapy intern was brutally gang-raped and murdered on a bus in Delhi. Four men were hanged for the gang rape, which had triggered a nationwide protests.

But despite new laws in place, “the graph of sexual violence in India continues to spiral unabated,” said Grover.

She added that in her experience at most workplaces, scant attention is paid to diligent and rigorous enforcement of the laws.

“It is regrettable that government and institutions respond only after the woman has already suffered sexual assault and often succumbed to death in the incident,” she added, saying preventive measures are not taken.

In many rape cases in India, perpetrators have not been held accountable. In 2002, Bano was raped by 11 men, who were sentenced to life imprisonment. In 2022, the government of Prime Minister Narendra Modi authorised the release of the men, who were greeted with applause and garlands upon their release.

However, their remission was overruled and the Supreme Court sent the rapists back to jail after public outcry.

Grover believes that the death penalty will not deter rapists until India addresses the deeply entrenched problem of sexual violence. “For any change, India as a society will have to confront and challenge, patriarchy, discrimination and inequality that is embedded in our homes, families, cultural practices, social norms and religious traditions”.

What makes this case particularly prominent is that it happened in Kolkata, Sandip Roy, a freelance contributor to NPR, told Al Jazeera. “Kolkata actually prided itself for a long time on being really low in the case of violence against women and being relatively safe for women.”

A National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) report said that Kolkata had the lowest number of rape cases in 2021 among 19 metropolitan cities, with 11 cases in the whole year. In comparison, New Delhi was reported to have recorded 1, 226 cases that year.

Prime Minister Modi’s governing Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) has called for dismissing the government in West Bengal, where Kolkata is located, led by Mamata Banerjee of All India Trinamool Congress (AITC). Banerjee’s party is part of the opposition alliance.

Rahul Gandhi, the leader of the opposition in parliament, also called for justice for the victim.

“The attempt to save the accused instead of providing justice to the victim raises serious questions on the hospital and the local administration,” he posted on X on Wednesday.

Roy spoke about the politicisation of the case since an opposition party governs West Bengal. “The local government’s opposition will try to make this an issue of women’s safety in the state,” he said.

Have doctors in India protested before?

Roy explained to Al Jazeera that this case is an overlap of two kinds of violence, the violence against a woman, as well as violence against “an overworked medical professional”.

Doctors in India do not have sufficient workplace security, and attacks on doctors have started protests in India before.

In 2019, two junior doctors were physically assaulted in Kolkata’s Nil Ratan Sircar Medical College and Hospital (NRSMCH) by a mob of people after a 75-year-old patient passed away in the hospital.

Those attacks set off doctors’ protests in Kolkata, and senior doctors in West Bengal offered to resign from their positions to express solidarity with the junior doctors who were attacked.

More than 75 percent of Indian doctors have faced some form of violence, according to a survey by the Indian Medical Association in 2015.

What happens next?

The case will now be handled by the CBI, which sent a team to the hospital premises to inspect the crime scene on Wednesday morning, local media reported.

According to Indian law, the investigation into a case of rape or gang rape is to be completed within two months from the date of lodging of the First Information Report (police complaint), according to Grover, the lawyer.

The highest court in West Bengal, which transferred the case from the local police to the CBI on Tuesday, has directed the central investigating agency to file periodic status reports regarding the progress of the investigation.

The FIR was filed on August 9, which means the investigation is expected to be completed by October 9.

Bengal women will create history with a night long protest in various major locations in the state for at 11.55pm on 14th of August’24,the night that’ll mark our 78th year as an independent country. The campaign, 'Women, Reclaim the Night: The Night is Ours', is aimed at seeking… pic.twitter.com/Si9fd6YGNb — purpleready (@epicnephrin_e) August 13, 2024

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What to Know About Mpox

The World Health Organization declared a global health emergency over an outbreak that has spread to more than a dozen African countries.

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By Eve Sampson

Mpox was declared a global health emergency on Wednesday for the second time in three years, as the World Health Organization urged action on a virus spreading rapidly through more than a dozen African countries.

The outbreak is most severe in the Democratic Republic of Congo, which has reported 15,600 mpox cases and 537 deaths, according to the U.N. agency . The mpox epidemic there has already proved more deadly than one in 2022, the last time an emergency was announced.

Here is what to know about mpox, which was known as monkeypox before health officials, responding to complaints about the word, recommended its current name in 2022.

What is mpox and how is it spread?

The mpox virus is endemic to Central and Western Africa. The disease is similar to smallpox but less contagious, and the virus is spread primarily through close contact with infected animals or people, and the consumption of contaminated meat.

Mpox can also be spread through sexual contact, and there is a risk of transmission to a fetus.

Who is currently being affected?

Ninety-six percent of the mpox deaths reported in June were in Congo, a country already assailed by an internal conflict and humanitarian crisis . But the disease has now been identified in 13 countries, including for the first time in the East African nations of Burundi, Kenya, Rwanda and Uganda.

There are differences between the outbreaks in various regions and countries, depending on the circumstances in each community, according to Dr. Sylvie Jonckheere, an adviser on emerging infectious diseases for Doctors Without Borders. But they share a common feature, she said: “We do not know how to control this outbreak.”

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