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FRIENDS, LOVERS, AND THE BIG TERRIBLE THING

by Matthew Perry ‧ RELEASE DATE: Nov. 1, 2022

Strictly for Perry’s fans.

The TV star details his career and his major addiction issues.

"I don't think it's an exaggeration to suggest that Chandler Bing transformed the way America spoke," writes Perry of his character on the megahit sitcom Friends , who habitually emphasized a different word in a sentence than one might expect. Could this be any bigger of a deal? Apparently not. "Aaron [Sorkin] and Tommy [Schlamme] had changed the way America looked at serialized TV with The West Wing , and I had changed how America spoke English,” writes the author. Certainly, plenty of readers will be interested in Perry's fabulous wealth and extraordinary fame—at one point in his life, he was one of the "most famous people in the world—in fact, I was being burned by the white-hot flame of fame”—his unsuccessful relationships with women, his 15 trips to rehab (“I have spent upward of $7 million to get sober”), numerous surgeries for the ravages of opioid-induced constipation, and his inability to add anything significant to his resume after Friends . However, Perry is a blurter, not a storyteller, and no ghostwriter or collaborator was involved in this project. Though he asserts that he does not blame his parents for his difficulties, the author sticks a major pin in the day they sent him on an airplane as an unaccompanied minor when he was 5 years old. Some will find it hard to sympathize with this story, and further mean-spirited outbursts don’t help—e.g., "Why is it that original thinkers like River Phoenix and Heath Ledger died, but Keanu Reeves still walks among us?" The concluding chapters trail off into what could be notes for some future acceptance speech. "I am me," he writes. "And that should be enough, it always has been enough." It’s not enough to carry this memoir.

Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2022

ISBN: 9781250866448

Page Count: 272

Publisher: Flatiron Books

Review Posted Online: Oct. 26, 2022

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Dec. 1, 2022

BIOGRAPHY & MEMOIR | ENTERTAINMENT, SPORTS & CELEBRITY

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New York Times Bestseller

by Stephanie Johnson & Brandon Stanton illustrated by Henry Sene Yee ‧ RELEASE DATE: July 12, 2022

A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.

A former New York City dancer reflects on her zesty heyday in the 1970s.

Discovered on a Manhattan street in 2020 and introduced on Stanton’s Humans of New York Instagram page, Johnson, then 76, shares her dynamic history as a “fiercely independent” Black burlesque dancer who used the stage name Tanqueray and became a celebrated fixture in midtown adult theaters. “I was the only black girl making white girl money,” she boasts, telling a vibrant story about sex and struggle in a bygone era. Frank and unapologetic, Johnson vividly captures aspects of her former life as a stage seductress shimmying to blues tracks during 18-minute sets or sewing lingerie for plus-sized dancers. Though her work was far from the Broadway shows she dreamed about, it eventually became all about the nightly hustle to simply survive. Her anecdotes are humorous, heartfelt, and supremely captivating, recounted with the passion of a true survivor and the acerbic wit of a weathered, street-wise New Yorker. She shares stories of growing up in an abusive household in Albany in the 1940s, a teenage pregnancy, and prison time for robbery as nonchalantly as she recalls selling rhinestone G-strings to prostitutes to make them sparkle in the headlights of passing cars. Complemented by an array of revealing personal photographs, the narrative alternates between heartfelt nostalgia about the seedier side of Manhattan’s go-go scene and funny quips about her unconventional stage performances. Encounters with a variety of hardworking dancers, drag queens, and pimps, plus an account of the complexities of a first love with a drug-addled hustler, fill out the memoir with personality and candor. With a narrative assist from Stanton, the result is a consistently titillating and often moving story of human struggle as well as an insider glimpse into the days when Times Square was considered the Big Apple’s gloriously unpolished underbelly. The book also includes Yee’s lush watercolor illustrations.

Pub Date: July 12, 2022

ISBN: 978-1-250-27827-2

Page Count: 192

Publisher: St. Martin's

Review Posted Online: July 27, 2022

BIOGRAPHY & MEMOIR | ENTERTAINMENT, SPORTS & CELEBRITY | GENERAL BIOGRAPHY & MEMOIR

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by Brandon Stanton

by Brandon Stanton photographed by Brandon Stanton

by Brandon Stanton ; photographed by Brandon Stanton

LOVE, PAMELA

by Pamela Anderson ‧ RELEASE DATE: Jan. 31, 2023

A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.

The iconic model tells the story of her eventful life.

According to the acknowledgments, this memoir started as "a fifty-page poem and then grew into hundreds of pages of…more poetry." Readers will be glad that Anderson eventually turned to writing prose, since the well-told anecdotes and memorable character sketches are what make it a page-turner. The poetry (more accurately described as italicized notes-to-self with line breaks) remains strewn liberally through the pages, often summarizing the takeaway or the emotional impact of the events described: "I was / and still am / an exceptionally / easy target. / And, / I'm proud of that ." This way of expressing herself is part of who she is, formed partly by her passion for Anaïs Nin and other writers; she is a serious maven of literature and the arts. The narrative gets off to a good start with Anderson’s nostalgic memories of her childhood in coastal Vancouver, raised by very young, very wild, and not very competent parents. Here and throughout the book, the author displays a remarkable lack of anger. She has faced abuse and mistreatment of many kinds over the decades, but she touches on the most appalling passages lightly—though not so lightly you don't feel the torment of the media attention on the events leading up to her divorce from Tommy Lee. Her trip to the pages of Playboy , which involved an escape from a violent fiance and sneaking across the border, is one of many jaw-dropping stories. In one interesting passage, Julian Assange's mother counsels Anderson to desexualize her image in order to be taken more seriously as an activist. She decided that “it was too late to turn back now”—that sexy is an inalienable part of who she is. Throughout her account of this kooky, messed-up, enviable, and often thrilling life, her humility (her sons "are true miracles, considering the gene pool") never fails her.

Pub Date: Jan. 31, 2023

ISBN: 9780063226562

Page Count: 256

Publisher: Dey Street/HarperCollins

Review Posted Online: Dec. 5, 2022

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2023

Book: Tim Allen Exposed Himself to Pamela Anderson

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Asha Seth | Book Blogger

Friends, lovers, and the big terrible thing: book review by asha seth.

Published on

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing

Author: Mathew Perry | Publisher: Flatiron Books | Pages: 250

“Hi, my name is Matthew, although you may know me by another name. My friends call me Matty. And I should be dead.” So begins the riveting story of acclaimed actor Matthew Perry, taking us along on his journey from childhood ambition to fame to addiction and recovery in the aftermath of a life-threatening health scare. Before the frequent hospital visits and stints in rehab, there was five-year-old Matthew, who traveled from Montreal to Los Angeles, shuffling between his separated parents; fourteen-year-old Matthew, who was a nationally ranked tennis star in Canada; twenty-four-year-old Matthew, who nabbed a coveted role as a lead cast member on the talked-about pilot then called Friends Like Us . . . and so much more. Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening—as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for.

Introduction

Written by the late Mathew Perry himself, ‘Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing’ is the memoir of the author chronicling his life, allowing readers to closely know the person best known for playing the sarcastic-yet-charming Chandler Bing on the iconic sitcom ‘Friends.’ Published a year before Perry’s passing in 2023, this book delves into the secrets, answers, and untold stories of the actor’s life. More importantly, Perry lets us peek into the darker side of his life, narrating his long and arduous battle with addiction. Matthew Perry lays bare the fractured family that raised him, the desire for recognition that drove him to fame, and the void inside him that could not be filled even by his greatest dreams coming true.

Writing & Content

While the content of the book is moving and introspective on the whole, the writing is where this books was a big disappointment for the sheer volume of redundancy; and that becomes evident right in the first few pages itself. The book is not presented as a linear timeline but unfolds in a series of vivid snapshots, flitting erratically between various stages of Perry’s life, and that makes it hard to keep up with the prose, also making it boringly repetitive. The book covers all important aspects of Perry’s life – a dysfunctional childhood, wayward adulthood, his career opportunities; both grabbed and lost, his apathetic relationships, struggles with alcoholism, and not to forget – his meteoric rise to fame through the famous sitcom ‘Friends.’ While the book’s true focus lies in the ever-present labyrinth of Perry’s addiction which altered his life and choices for the worst, it also sheds light on his long haul juggling life between addiction and sobriety.

Perry delves into the depths of his struggles, detailing his descent into alcoholism and drug abuse, fueled by anxiety and insecurities, with great details. We witness his relapses, stints in rehab, and near-death experiences, all narrated with rare honesty. The memoir also reveals Perry’s lovers and frequent relationships with women. His childhood traumas because of his parents’ divorce and lack of family support, all come back to his adult life in distorted ways. While glimpses of Chandler’s wit flicker throughout, the narrative is far from humorous. And although it does help one understand the arduous battle those suffering from addiction face continually, it fails to put him in the right light as the book brims with condescension, pomposity, indifference, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. As such, one can’t fail to notice that the book does more damage to his image than build it. That said, Perry isn’t the one who’s at fault here, but his team of editors surely is. How could they miss the basics, one wonders!

“I would give up all the money, all the fame, all the stuff, to live in a rent-controlled apartment—I’d trade being worried about money all the time to not have this disease, this addiction.”

Language & Style

Like Chandler Bing, who relies on humor to cope, Perry too reflects that in his writing style but with a tad unpleasant outlook. The language has hints of self-pity in more chapters than one, and makes you think if Perry could’ve done better with the writing approach. Although his voice is raw and candid, the ceaseless revisiting of his sober and caving-in instances has a monotonous flavor to it that would quickly put the reader off. His confessions raw and intense, don’t leave the impact that they intend to. And even though Perry doesn’t romanticize any of it, he does come out as tad egotistic which may leave one flabbergasted because that’s not the person we believed he was in real life. One can only hope that it’s truly just the aftermath of a badly edited book and not the author’s true nature. The biggest turn-off of this book is perhaps, it’s writing and language itself.

“If I had to do it all over again, would I still audition for Friends? You bet your ass I would. Would I drink again? You bet your ass I would. If I didn’t have alcohol to soothe my nerves and help me have fun, I would have leaped off a tall building sometime in my twenties.”

Engageability

While Perry is the narrator of his story, we meet multiple people, friends, and family, essentially the supporting cast, all of which plays a crucial role in shaping the narrative. We meet his parents, who could not fully grasp his inner turmoil. His on-screen “Friends” – Jennifer Aniston, Matt LeBlanc, Courtney Cox, and Lisa Kudrow, became more than just co-stars. They become his anchors of support. Lisa Kudrow, specifically emerges as a pillar of compassion and empathy. But the most impactful characters are the invisible ones: the addictions themselves. Perry personifies them as sly companions, seductive yet destructive, their presence dominant throughout the book. The detailed lens on his life on FRIENDS was perhaps the most engaging bit because of the show’s popularity. He even mentions women he’s dated and how all of his relationships ended up being tragedies because of his addiction and indifference to them, in general. This he regrets greatly in the respective chapters.

“I sometimes do want to tell God to go fuck himself for making my road so hard.”

The narrative takes us through the uncomfortable dynamics of Perry’s childhood home to the glamorous but isolating Hollywood lifestyle. The luxurious confines of rehabilitation centers he frequented become another recurring backdrop, contrasting starkly with the dirt and grime of drug dens and haunting hospital rooms. One does get a view of the life of those suffering from addiction issues, but this book doesn’t dig a hole into your heart with his half-baked attempts at getting sober perpetually, giving up at the slightest trigger, and blaming everyone around him for things that happened to him. It appears like a teenager’s whine than a witty account of a grown-up adult, who’s seen the ups and downs of life. With someone like Perry who comes with fair chances of opportunities and a vast bandwidth of experiences, you expect a lot more than just general dissing of people, places, and things. The only saving streak for a reader is the fact that Perry does make generous efforts at helping those who had their lives ruined by addiction.

Final Verdict

“Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing” is a moving memoir about the struggle to be happy in the face of fame while also dealing with drug and alcohol addiction by one of the most-loved actors and comedians of our time. The memoir is a journey, not a linear one, but one with several ups and downs, and Mathew Perry did try his best to cope with ‘The Big Terrible Thing’ as best as he could, and the reader’s heart does go out to him for his adversities. That said, the memoir leaves one surprised but not satiated, for the true account of Perry’s condition comes full-blown to the reader and it’s a heartbreaking one, but laden with shortcomings when it comes to writing, editing, language, and overall approach. With a keen eye to detail and editing, this memoir could have been notches higher and left Perry’s fans and readers feeling more sympathetic and less agitated with the revelations thus bared.

Read this book to glimpse into behind-the-scenes of Mathew Perry’s life, read this book to unearth the life and world of the addiction-afflicted, but most importantly read this memoir to know that Mathew Perry was not Chandler and yet there couldn’t be a Chandler without Mathew Perry!

Author Profile

Matthew Perry was an American-Canadian actor, comedian and producer. He gained international recognition in the 1990s for playing Chandler Bing on the NBC television sitcom Friends (1994–2004), and earned a Screen Actors Guild Award for the role.

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14 responses to “Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: Book Review by Asha Seth”

Thank you, Asha, for the excellent and objective book review of memoirs by Matthew Perry. any people have a difficult childhood but don’t squander their lives and opportunities on drugs and alcohol. I will reserve my sympathy for those truly in need.

Thanks for reading through, Joanna. Appreciate you taking the time. This book clearly doesn’t give off Mathew Perry in a very good light. And that drove me mad frequently. You’d expect a memoir to be well-written and do a good job highlighting the person’s life, especially when it’s been a difficult one. While trying to be funny and sarcastic, Perry comes off as snobbish and pompous. What a disaster!

You gave the book a 2.4 ⭐ rating? Wow! You’re some reviewer!

It’s exactly how I felt, and not very good as is evident.

It wasn’t the best I agree… I realy expected better considering the person he was portrayed on tele and yes his personal life was very very disturbing, the book shouldn’t have highlighted it so much

That’s right, Savio. Some books do more damage than good; both for the author and its readers. This is a classic example.

Quite insightful a review. I’ve read mixed reviews of this book on Goodreads but readers seem to be disappointed largely. Would you recommend this, Asha?

Well, it’s not what you’d expect but why should that stop you from reading it?

Interesting review. I was always a Chandler fan but never knew much about Mathew Perry. I will give this book a try.

We all are Chandler Bing fans, and also why I wanted to read it. Do pick it up as it’s not all that bad either.

Nice review, ma’am.

Thanks, Manav.

Another book not worth the hype it seems.

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Review: 'Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing,' by Matthew Perry

Books in brief.

By Neal Justin

Could Matthew Perry be any more vulnerable? In his bestselling memoir, the former "Friends" star shares his battles with addiction in excruciating detail: stealing pills from strangers' homes, emptying endless bottles of vodka and arranging for drug dealers to visit him in treatment centers. It's the part of his 12-step program where he's making amends with his fans.

Perry is less forthcoming about his showbiz adventures. He spends an entire chapter lauding "Whole Ten Yards" co-star Bruce Willis and shares dirt about how he blew a promising romance with Julia Roberts. But he shies away from backstage tales about his work, except for when he's dealing with how he let down his castmates. (He spends a lot of ink apologizing to Jennifer Aniston.)

TV fans would have loved at least more than passing references to his guest appearances on "The West Wing" and his fine performance as Teddy Kennedy in "The Kennedys — After Camelot" miniseries. Perry has written for stage and screen, so he knows how to tell a story. The book, however, leans a little too hard on cliches.

He ends up repeating certain anecdotes, sometimes within a few pages of each other. Those who have struggled with drugs and alcohol, though, will forgive him. If Perry's only goal was to be an inspiration to fellow addicts, he's succeeded.

Neal Justin is the Star Tribune's TV critic.

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing

By: Matthew Perry.

Publisher: Flatiron Books, 250 pages, $29.99.

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Neal justin.

Neal Justin covers the entertainment world, primarily TV and radio. He also reviews stand-up comedy. Justin is the founder of JCamp, a non-profit program for high-school journalists, and works on many fronts to further diversity in newsrooms.

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Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible...

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir

Could this BE any more timely? Could this BE any sadder? Could he BE any more sorry about what he’s done to himself and others? The answer to these questions is NO, very much a NO.

Matthew Perry’s memoir, FRIENDS, LOVERS, AND THE BIG TERRIBLE THING, presents yet another chapter in one of the most popular television shows of all time. But he is very ready to address all of his personal demons in public. Perhaps by us knowing what has brought him to this point, he will feel seen and use our knowledge as a way to keep him on the straight and narrow path.

"Congratulations to [Matthew Perry] for being alive, first and foremost, and for writing a compelling, partly TMI book about one man’s battle against himself. Could there BE a more human story than that? I don’t think so."

There are plenty of memoirs in which celebrities tell you all about the behind-the-scenes horrors they have endured, but this book is different. Perry doesn’t really blame anyone but himself. And it’s a big deal to admit to everything one has done while masking pain in the giant world arena.

At a recent interview in Princeton, NJ, Perry looked wired but in a good way. He was sassy and spoke directly to the audience, echoing the sentiments put forth in his book: “I have an addictive personality, and now I can’t even be around drugs or alcohol.” He said he is pleased to be on the other side of this pain, but the people with whom he has burned bridges is a long and sad list.

Perry addresses his childhood, his attempts to be more like his father (the Old Spice guy from the ’80s), his brilliance at tennis (he was a junior champion in the US), his ability to keep the family peace as a people pleaser after his parents’ divorce, and his wandering into show business and the issues that arose when his dad, now remarried with a new family, grew jealous of him as “Friends” became a juggernaut.

He understands quite distinctly that his professional success did not make his personal shortcomings any easier, and the book is filled with the detritus of all the lost relationships with wonderful women (like Julia Roberts, Lizzy Caplan and Jamie Tarses, the latter of whom saved his life on more than one occasion) and the love he has fostered with his family. He is an AA advocate and has a newfound spirituality that gives him the strength to fight his addictions. This memoir is quite a journey.

There are a lot of details, physical ones, that make FRIENDS, LOVERS, AND THE BIG TERRIBLE THING feel a bit like a DARE notebook. It is a scared straight of sorts for those who think that addiction is not a disease (could they BE any more wrong?) This book could be handed to every kid who spent COVID lockdown watching “Friends” on repeat to remind them that drugs and alcohol never get rid of problems --- they only mask them.

Perry was part of a group of young actors, including Hank Azaria and Craig Bierko, who did not quite reach the heights that he did (although they have very successful careers), and how he became Chandler Bing is a story of fortune and destiny. He is more like the snarky, funny, vulnerable Chandler in person than he is in the book; in these pages he is forthright and funny at times, but angry and then resigned as his illness goes on.

To watch this handsome, talented man write so honestly about how his addiction and fears have turned him into a bachelor semi-recluse is a difficult read. As George Clooney once said, TV stars are like part of someone’s family: they are in your life like a family member, coming into your living room while you are resting in your underwear. We think of Chandler as someone we actually know. But Matthew Perry is a man, a survivor, an addict, a son, a friend --- a lot of things that FRIENDS, LOVERS, AND THE BIG TERRIBLE THING makes clear are now far more important to him than being an actor ever could be.

Congratulations to him for being alive, first and foremost, and for writing a compelling, partly TMI book about one man’s battle against himself. Could there BE a more human story than that? I don’t think so.

Reviewed by Jana Siciliano on November 21, 2022

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir by Matthew Perry

Publication Date: June 25, 2024
Genres: Memoir , Nonfiction
Paperback: 272 pages
Publisher: Flatiron Books
ISBN-10: 1250866456
ISBN-13: 9781250866455

The One Where Matthew Perry Writes an Addiction Memoir

In “Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing,” the actor gets serious about sobriety, mortality, colostomy bags and pickleball.

By the time he was 49, Matthew Perry writes in his new book, he had spent more than half of his life in treatment centers or sober living facilities. Credit... Michelle Groskopf for The New York Times

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By Elisabeth Egan

Published Oct. 23, 2022 Updated June 20, 2023

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BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. — When I pictured Matthew Perry, the actor frequently known as Chandler Bing, I saw him on the tangerine couch at Central Perk or seated on one of the twin recliners in the apartment he shared with Joey Tribbiani.

In September, after arriving at his 6,300-square-foot rental house and being ushered through a driveway gate by his sober companion, I sat across from Perry, who perched on a white couch in a white living room, a world away from “Friends,” the NBC sitcom that aired for 10 seasons and catapulted all six of its stars into fame, fortune and infinite memes. Instead of the foosball table where Chandler, Joey, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel and Ross gathered, nudging each other through the first chapters of adulthood, Perry, 53, had a red felt pool table that looked untouched. There was plenty of light in the house, but not a lot of warmth.

I have watched every episode of “Friends” three times — in prime time, on VHS and on Netflix — but I’m not sure I would have recognized Perry if I’d seen him on the street. If he was an ebullient terrier in those 1990s-era Must See TV days — as memorable for his full-body comedy as he was for the inflection that made “Can you BE any more [insert adjective]” the new “Gag me with a spoon” — he now seemed more like an apprehensive bulldog, with the forehead furrows to match.

As his former co-star Lisa Kudrow confesses in the foreword to his memoir, “Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing,” the first question people ask about “Friends” is often “How’s Matthew Perry doing?”

Perry answers that question in the book, which Flatiron will publish on Nov. 1, by starkly chronicling his decades-long cage match with drinking and drug use. His addiction led to a medical odyssey in 2018 that included pneumonia, an exploded colon, a brief stint on life support, two weeks in a coma, nine months with a colostomy bag, more than a dozen stomach surgeries, and the realization that, by the time he was 49, he had spent more than half of his life in treatment centers or sober living facilities.

Most of this is covered in the prologue. At one point, he writes in a parenthetical, “Please note: for the next few paragraphs, this book will be a biography rather than a memoir because I was no longer there.”

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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: The powerful memoir from the beloved star of Friends

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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: The powerful memoir from the beloved star of Friends Hardcover – 1 Nov. 2022

'There's never been a more honest or raw memoir . . . and it may just save lives' Daily Mail 'Funny, fascinating, compelling . . . also a wonderful read for fans of Friends ' The Times 'HI, MY NAME IS MATTHEW, although you may know me by my full name. My friends call me Matty.' So begins the riveting story of acclaimed actor Matthew Perry, taking us along on his journey from childhood ambition to fame to addiction and recovery in the aftermath of a life-threatening health scare. Before the frequent hospital visits and stints in rehab, there was five-year-old Matthew, who travelled from Montreal to Los Angeles, shuffling between his separated parents; fourteen-year-old Matthew, who was a nationally ranked tennis star in Canada; twenty-four-year-old Matthew, who nabbed a coveted role as a lead cast member on the talked-about pilot then called Friends Like Us . . . and so much more. In an extraordinary story that only he could tell - and in the heartfelt, hilarious, and warmly familiar way only he could tell it - Matthew Perry lays bare the fractured family that raised him (and also left him to his own devices), the desire for recognition that drove him to fame, and the void inside him that could not be filled even by his greatest dreams coming true. But he also details the peace he's found in sobriety and how he feels about the ubiquity of Friends, sharing stories about his castmates and other stars he met along the way. Frank, self-aware, and with his trademark humour, Perry vividly depicts his lifelong battle with addiction and what fuelled it despite seemingly having it all. 'An unflinching and often harrowing must-read for 90s pop culture fans' Guardian 'Written with Chandler's trademark sarcasm and self-deprecation' Telegraph 'A hopeful read . . . I started to think of [it] not as a celebrity memoir about addiction, but as an addiction memoir written by a man who understands his own history through the prism of showbiz' Independent

Print length 272 pages
Language English
Publisher Headline
Publication date 1 Nov. 2022
Dimensions 15.8 x 3.2 x 23.8 cm
ISBN-10 1472295935
ISBN-13 978-1472295934
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From the Publisher

The intimate and eye-opening autobiography of the acclaimed Friends star

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Book description, about the author, product details.

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Headline (1 Nov. 2022)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 272 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1472295935
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1472295934
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 15.8 x 3.2 x 23.8 cm
2 in Alcohol & Drug Abuse Biographies
4 in Biographies about Essays, Journals & Letters
41 in Actors & Entertainers Biographies

About the author

Matthew perry.

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Customers find the book very honest, open, and humorous. They also find the addiction research interesting and smart. Readers describe the scope as open, refreshing, and raw. They describe the book as wonderful, funny, and emotional. However, some find the complexity repetitive and confusing. They feel the characters are self-indulgent and mean-spirited.

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Customers find the book emotionally moving, incredibly sad, and enjoyable to read. They also say it's beautifully written and honest.

"...struggles and experiences that Matthew Perry had, and in an enjoyable to read way ...." Read more

"This book was funny, sad and moving all rolled in to one. A tragic tale of a man who had the world at his feet but battled addiction for most of it...." Read more

"...I am about halfway through and the book is very personal and moving at times...." Read more

"...It’s not well written , well edited or produced, however this adds to the charm that as you progress through the book you can feel his troubled life..." Read more

Customers find the addiction research in the book insightful, honest, and raw. They also say it's brave and deep.

"...A truly interesting biopic and worth the read" Read more

"...This is a superb memoir. It's brutally honest and very insightful . Worryingly, Perry's voice on the audiobook is that of an old, weary man...." Read more

"A brilliant book! It really depicts the struggles and experiences that Matthew Perry had, and in an enjoyable to read way...." Read more

"Very, very personal insight into the very funny but also very sad life of Matthew Perry...." Read more

Customers find the book very honest, open, and humorous. They also say it's an honest read about Matthew's life.

"...This is a superb memoir. It's brutally honest and very insightful. Worryingly, Perry's voice on the audiobook is that of an old, weary man...." Read more

"...It's introspective and brutally honest . There's no WHINING as some say.. just confusion fear and determination to keep going...." Read more

"...sections on Perry’s addiction (was the majority of the book) was brutally honest ...." Read more

" Truthful … one sided … an extremely thought provoking...." Read more

Customers find the book wonderfully funny and insightful into the life of a fabulous comedic actor.

"This book was funny , sad and moving all rolled in to one. A tragic tale of a man who had the world at his feet but battled addiction for most of it...." Read more

"...There is some dark humour to take away some of the darkness Matthew Perry has faced...." Read more

"Wonderful book, quite upsetting at times . So glad he got to write this before his untimely passing. He did so much good to help people." Read more

"Great book, been waiting to read, funny too" Read more

Customers find the book very real, raw, and funny. They also say it's not well written, edited, or produced, but this adds to the charm. Customers also mention that the book is absolutely immaculate for a second hand book.

"...It’s not well written, well edited or produced , however this adds to the charm that as you progress through the book you can feel his troubled life..." Read more

" Wonderfully raw and deeply personal, i am so glad Matthew had time to write his story before he left us...." Read more

"...just a list of accomplishments or an excuse to whinge, this is raw , emotional, witty, funny, insightful and sheds a much needed light on the horror..." Read more

"Not read it yet but for a second hand book it is absolutely immaculate . Thank you" Read more

Customers find the scope of the book open, honest, and refreshing. They also say Matthew Perry really opens up.

"...Wow!! There’s a no holds barred with his autobiography. He is so open and honest about his life and addictions, he just tells it like it is...." Read more

"A very honest, open and humorous read...." Read more

"Loved this , was so open and honest, got very emotional reading this, highly recommend if you love autobiography I will love this" Read more

"This is the most open and heart wrenching read. Matthew is brutally honest about his lifelong battle with addiction...." Read more

Customers find the book repetitive, confusing, and chaotic. They also say the narrative jumps around all over the place.

"...say is written in a strange format , sometimes it can be a little hard to follow time lines etc...." Read more

"Really enjoyed this , some of the chronology was all over the place but in a way I think it added to the content of the autobiography" Read more

"...For me it makes it a bit hard to follow , that is the only reason I considered taking a star off...." Read more

"...It wombled about and it was almost impossible to work out the chronology of his life, jumping as it did backwards and forwards with no warning or..." Read more

Customers find the character in the book mean-spirited, self-pitying, and narcissistic. They also say he's troubled, spoiled, and lacks humility.

"...He presents himself as very narcissistic person ...." Read more

"Very, very personal insight into the very funny but also very sad life of Matthew Perry ...." Read more

"...Gutted because I wanted to like this but it lacked humility , gratitude and care for others...." Read more

"...quelled his demons and got to peace as it feels quite bitter and angry . And could it be more funny? Yes it jolly well could...." Read more

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Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir

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Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry book review

I’ve always been a massive fan of Friends , it is without a doubt one of my favourite shows of all time and I’ll put it on almost any time of the day. When I saw Matthew Perry had released a memoir, I was very keen to read who the real Chandler was. I knew about his addiction but only on a very surface level “Ooh, did you know Chandler was apparently addicted to drugs during his time on Friends ” sort of level but wasn’t aware of the horrible and harrowing depths to which the addiction took over his life.

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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing tells Matthew Perry’s memoir, focusing on his incredible ongoing and relentless battle with addictions to drugs and alcohol. If you’re a fan of Friends then I will warn you that this may change the way you look at the show forever. In short: despite the humour and joy the show produces, Perry is struggling with staying alive behind the scenes and it begins to get into his work.

Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing plot – 4.5/5

So this is a memoir so the review of the plot isn’t based on what the writer has created and how well it has all come together, but more my simple reaction to the incredible stories and overall tale that Perry has chosen to tell.

In Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing Perry starts you from the very beginning of his life, talking about his parents and his opinions on how they parented him, how he grew up using humour as a way of covering up any insecurities, how when he first got drunk instead of throwing up or feeling fear like his friends, he felt true bliss for the very first time. It’s all very harrowing with a lot of explanations (though crucially never excuses) as to where he thinks the addiction make have sourced from.

He talks about his time in Friends , his struggle with balancing his addiction with relationships and his professional life. He discusses how despite being good-looking, ridiculously wealthy and very successful, nothing could help his addiction.

The whole book is very dark. There are moments where he discusses nearly dying and some very troubling moments in his life. I commend Perry for not pulling any punches here and being brutal and honest about all of the horrible moments he faced. I don’t want to spoil the book too much as there’s so much to digest in here which will leave you feeling quite sorry for Perry but also so proud (he’s technically been sober since 2001 but has recently said that he’s now properly sober).

One other thing I must mention is that this book, despite being about a very dark matter still manages to slip in some humour. If you’re not someone who can take a darker joke, this may not be the book for you.

Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing characters – 4/5

How does one rate the characters from a memoir? Well I think the best place to start is the personality and opinions that Matthew Perry himself gives across. When I went into this book, I heard he had come out as a bit of an ass. However, this is likely again from those with fairly weak walls. As I mentioned in the paragraph above, if you can’t take a joke, then yes you’ll likely take offence with some of the things in this list (though I can tell you now, none of it is aimed at you.)

Perry praises almost everyone he’s worked with, including his Friends costars who you’d think after working with them for ten years he’d have some bad things to say about, but he simply doesn’t/

The vibe he gives off is that he’s actually a very nice guy who has grown an ego based on being one of the most popular names in America for a few years and having earned a hideous amount of money. Also, for a while, he was considered incredibly really good-looking and could literally get any woman he wanted. With all of this, he’s grown an ego that you have to argue many would struggle to contain.

However, despite his willingness to accept these aspects of his life, he never forgets to remember how very low he was or how mean he was to certain people when high or drunk. He talks of it as a disease that ate away at him and controlled the way he lived his life for way too long – making you feel sorry for him!

Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing final rating – 4.5

Matthew Perry’s memoir Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing was an incredibly powerful tale of a man who, to everyone’s untrained eye had everything: money, good looks, fame, popularity, the women, the house, the cars, the career. But behind that, away from the public, the limelight and the cameras he was struggling with one of the most all-encompassing diseases somebody with an able body could suffer from – an addiction.

If you’re a fan of Friends , I’d go into this book with caution as you may never be able to watch it without thinking of Chandler differently. However, in the same breath, I’d wholeheartedly recommend reading Perry’s story. It’s real, it’s brutal and it is emotional – everything you want the memoir of one of the most famous men on TV to be.

Pick up a copy of Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing from Amazon here.

If you liked this book then you may like my reviews of the following books:

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2 thoughts on “ Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry book review ”

This is a great review Luke, I’ve been umminng and ahhing about reading this since it was released- Friends fan. Like you, I only know the surface level details about his addiction, sounds like a powerful read.

Thanks Sarah. Yeah, it’s very eye-opening and very sad, both of which made it a fascinating read!

Book Club Questions on Matthew Perry's Friends, Lovers, and the Terrible Big Thing

Perry shares a lot of highs and lows of life in Friends, Lovers and the Terrible Big Thing. Discuss what you found the most poignant moment in the book. Why did you think this mattered so much?
What similarities did you find between between the characters of Matthew Perry and Chandler?
What did you learn about rehab from reading Matthew Perry’s book? Do you think Perry’s representation of rehabilitation is accurate and fair?
At one point in the text, Perry is involved, relatively seriously, with two women at the same time. How, if at all, did this affect your opinion of Matthew Perry?
The foreward of the book was written by Lisa Kudrow, but yet she wasn’t in the Friends cast photo that was shared at the end of the book? Did you attach any signficance to this? And if so what?
How important do you think personal photographs are in a celebrity autobiography?
What do you think motivates celebrities to write their autobiographies, or is it impossible to generalize?
Matthew Perry’s life was changed forever when he was cast as Chandler. Has anything (not in a show-biz way, but more everyday) changed your life forever? Discuss.
Discuss what you know about addiction. If you’d like to share any stories of how addiction has affected your own life, or that of yourself, family and friends go ahead and do so.

This is the most honest, raw and interesting autobiography that I’ve read. I was fascinated with how open and frank Matthew Perry was. It intrigues me that he said the only reason he no longer partakes in drink and drugs is because he couldn’t get enough of either to have an effect on him. There was absolutely no sugar-coating of the trauma, embarrassment and pain, suffering and loss that Perry’s addiction brought him. Far more effectively than anything else I’ve ever read, was his presentation on the power that addiction has over an individual. For lovers of Friends, the T.V, series, the book presents a fascinating itinerary and timeline of how Chandler’s appearance parallels his dependency on drugs. The more hooked he was the thinner he appeared! Despite Perry’s honesty, I couldn’t quite bring myself to fully empathise with him. Whether it was how how Perry repeatedly said that he’d give up his wealth and fame to be cured, or whether it was his constant reference to being lonely, while still cheating on his partners, I felt a tad of irritation. Perhaps it was just the realisation that Matthew Perry, and thus, in my eyes, Chandler, was just a flawed human like all of us. Having said that Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing was a well-written book and a good read. I would definitely recommend it, especially to anyone who is trying to understand the complexities of addiction.

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Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry, review: A bleak, exhausting addiction memoir

If you're looking for 90s nostalgia and behind-the-scenes gossip, more fool you. for a book about a life getting high, this is a collection only of lows.

LONDON, ENGLAND - FEBRUARY 08: Matthew Perry poses at a photocall for "The End Of Longing", a new play which he wrote and stars in at The Playhouse Theatre, on February 8, 2016 in London, England. (Photo by David M. Benett/Dave Benett/Getty Images)

In 1994, three weeks before he was cast as Chandler Bing in Friends , Matthew Perry prayed.

“God, you can do whatever you want to me. Just please make me famous.” The actor’s memoir, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing , is the story of how God held up both sides of that bargain. It is an account of three decades of addiction, crippling pain, comas, an exploding colon, loneliness, self-hatred, self-sabotage, failed relationships, and expensive rehabs (it is also an account of the staggering expense of sobriety). Reading it is exactly as grim and as exhausting as all that sounds. For a book about a life getting high, this is a collection only of lows.

Matthew Perry grew up in Ottawa with his mother, who had high-profile jobs including as press secretary to prime minister Pierre Trudeau, and would travel unaccompanied to visit his father, an actor, in Los Angeles. He has had enough therapy to recognise that his problems might be rooted in that dysfunctional childhood and those long unsupervised journeys: the diffusion of tension by cracking wise, the fight for his mother’s attention one laugh at a time. (Perry acknowledges throughout his book the similarities between himself and Chandler.)

At 15, he moved to California to live with his father. There, drinking and fame presented themselves as solutions, things that could plug all the holes, fix him. The book follows his early twenties as a jobbing actor in the 90s, charming his way to his next gig, to his rise to the most famous man in the world on the biggest TV show in the world, dating Julia Roberts and firing golf balls out of Bruce Willis’s mansion in the Hollywood hills.

And it recounts all the times he was rushed to hospital and expected to die. It was written very recently, post-pandemic – Perry (now 53) sober and alone in a $20m, 20,000 square foot penthouse apartment with a stomach so scarred from overlapping surgeries that it looks like a topographical map of China.

Friends is what made and broke him, of course. Most people reading this will be fans of the show who know his character intimately (“if you’re going to be typecast, that’s the way to do it”). More fool you if you were hoping for 90s nostalgia and behind-the-scenes gossip: Perry might have been earning $1,100,000 per episode by the end but his desperate memories will not leave you keen to fire up the repeats.

All of his dreams had come true with this job but he couldn’t enjoy it unless he was high. Friends (like his life, and this book) hung precariously together between interventions and detoxes. “You can track the trajectory of my addiction if you gauge my weight from season to season – when I’m carrying weight, it’s alcohol; when I’m skinny, it’s pills. When I have a goatee, it’s lots of pills.” Monica and Chandler’s wedding? He was living in rehab at the time and had to be driven to and from set by his father.

But if he hadn’t got that part in a buzzy new sitcom originally called Friends Like Us – the one he knew should be his from the moment he read the first page of the script, the character whose very intonation felt like it had come from his own head (Chandler’s way of speaking would then go on, as Perry reminds us multiple times, to change the cadence of speech across America) – he would have “ended up on the streets of downtown LA shooting heroin in my arm until my untimely death”. (Heroin, by the way, has never been Perry’s drug of choice; he was too scared of that. He did pretty much everything else, though: OxyContin, Vicodin, at one period during filming of Friends he was on methadone, Xanax, cocaine, and a full quart of vodka every day.)

Perry says he always knew how lucky he was for Friends and the focus of his life became clinging onto it, even as he was “dying” in secret. He stayed sober on set, because “when you’re earning $1 million a week, you can’t afford to have the17th drink”. Much of this was out of a debt to his colleagues – supportive, concerned, talented, and mostly in the dark about just how serious this was; but he also suggests that not everybody wanted to admit the dire stakes.

“Everyone would ask me if I was all right, but nobody wanted to stop the Friends train because it was such a moneymaker, and I just felt horrible about it. My greatest joy was also my biggest nightmare – I was this close to messing up this wonderful thing.” He remembers the shame of his castmates covering for him: Matt LeBlanc jolting him awake when he dozed off on that Central Perk sofa; Jennifer Aniston confronting him in his trailer to tell him: “We can smell it.”

Every chapter of this book is interrupted by some vignette from a hospital or sober living facility (or the life-saving drive to one). It is as if Perry is jolting us between two worlds. One, the dizzying game of chance and fate that is Hollywood – Perry has spent the 18 years since Friends ended trying to be taken seriously as an actor and writer and he shares his experiences on other projects (including his leading part in Aaron Sorkin series Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip , his flop West End, and Broadway play The End of Longing , his bids to have a film script made). The other world, that horrific loop of drinking and smoking and having his stomach ripped open that he has spent his life replaying.

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It isn’t enjoyable (or funny, and Perry is funny) to read and it is not in the least bit glamorous. The chronology is scattered, he repeats himself and his anecdotes, and he at times seems bitter, while at others self-effacing. He has been in Alcoholics Anonymous for decades and at points his narration reads a little as if he is standing at a meeting, sharing his story.

But he shares few of the highs – the fame was a poisoned chalice, the women he’d push away before they saw the “real him”, and he refers to his own obscene wealth constantly as if he himself is bored of it. Instead the greatest impression is of the tedium of the disease that he still says is going to kill him, and the mantras that he relies on to help bide his time until it does.

He is self-aware – he only blames himself for the hurt he has caused. “I bring along the problems and the darkness and the shit” – needy, lonely, desperately, desperately sorry to the women he has hurt (hundreds) and never married, and to himself for the children he never had. He is serious about getting other people sober, grateful that he is now, and still pious to the God to whom he made that Faustian prayer.

This is dark and miserable and Perry leaves you in no doubt when he says: “I would give it all up not to feel this way. I think about it all the time.”

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing, by Matthew Perry, is published by Headline at £25

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From chandler’s cadence to addiction woes: 8 revelations from matthew perry’s memoir.

The actor's new book, 'Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing,' details his addiction issues and lets readers in on never-before-told stories from his long career.

By Seija Rankin

Seija Rankin

Senior Editor

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In Matthew Perry ‘s new memoir, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing , the author and actor spends most of the 250 pages discussing the Big Terrible Thing. For the very first time, he chronicles his addiction in great detail; Perry’s struggles with alcohol and painkillers have been known to the public for decades, but the book lays bare just how close to the edge he came — and how often.

He was supposed to be in Don’t Look Up

While the Netflix climate-apocalypse satire was in development, Perry took a meeting with one Adam McKay, which resulted in the offer of a role. He was to play a Republican journalist, in a small role that called for several scenes opposite Meryl Streep (who played a comically narcissistic U.S. president). Perry was supposed to be heading to another rehab stint — this time in Switzerland, much farther afield than his past stays — and had recently broken eight ribs while getting CPR. He was on 1,800 milligrams of hydrocodone, but flew to Boston to film. He worked on a group scene with Jonah Hill that never made it onscreen, and had to leave the set before working with Streep because of his injuries. “It was heartbreaking,” he writes. “But I was in too much pain.”

Chandler’s speech style started in the audition

Courteney cox set the collegial tone on the friends set.

When the sitcom started filming, Cox was easily the most famous of the group, thanks to her roles in Ace Ventura and Family Ties . But on the day that the six co-stars gathered for the first time on the Warner Bros. lot in Los Angeles, Cox said over lunch: “There are no stars here. This is an ensemble show. We’re all supposed to be friends.” As Perry explains, she’d seen a similar dynamic play out during a guest spot on Seinfeld — something he credits for kicking off the group’s eventual inseparability.

Perry’s courtship with Julia Roberts started with a fax about quantum physics

In season two, NBC was planning a big post-Super Bowl episode of Friends , and Julia Roberts agreed to guest-star — if she could be part of Chandler’s storyline. Marta Kauffman relayed this to Perry, along with a suggestion that he send her flowers. He did, along with a card that read, “The only thing more exciting than the prospect of you doing the show is that I finally have an excuse to send you flowers.” She replied, via fax, that she would only agree to the show if he “adequately explained quantum physics to her.” And thus, their fax flirtation was born. (He found a paper about wave-partical duality and the uncertainty principle to pass her way.)

Friends almost broke the fourth wall in season eight

David schwimmer suggested a group contract negotiation.

Friends made a lot of headlines going into its final season for their collective million-dollar-per-episode paydays. But, according to the memoir, the on-set collective bargaining started thanks to a suggestion from Schwimmer back in season one. Perry writes that the actor, who played Ross on Friends — and was the breakout star of the show in those early episodes (he was also the first to shoot a commercial, get his own movie, and buy his own house) — came into Perry’s dressing room and suggested they renegotiate their contracts as a team, and insist they all get paid the same amount. “It was a decision that proved to be extremely lucrative down the line,” Perry says. “David had certainly been in a position to go for the most money, and he didn’t. … It gave us a tremendous amount of power. By season eight, we were making a million dollars per episode; by season 10, we were making even more.”

Perry never filmed Friends while high

Season nine of friends was the only one during which perry was completely sober.

The actor shot the season seven finale, which featured Chandler and Monica’s wedding, while living at a Malibu rehab facility. By the summer after season eight, he had gotten clean again, and Perry says he stayed that way for the entirety of season nine, which he describes as his most successful on the show — it was also the only season for which he got nominated for a best actor Emmy. “What did I do differently that season? I listened. I didn’t just stand there and wait my turn to speak,” he writes. (While recently promoting his book, Perry told The New York Times he had been clean for 18 months, which means he was newly drug- and alcohol-free when the Friends reunion aired in May 2021 . “I’ve probably spent $9 million or something trying to get sober,” he estimated.)

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Matthew Perry (@mattyperry4)

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Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir

By Matthew Perry

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I'm determined. are you, book review: friends, lovers, and the big terrible thing.

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry was pretty popular, for a little time anyhow: another book floating down the stream of famous people memoir/exposes that rose to the top for one reason or another. Since Friends was one of the most popular TV series of all time and Perry’s battles with alcohol and drugs (and his weight) were played out in the tabloids and discussed over many-a-dinner-table during the 90s and early 2000s, it makes sense that people would want to read the book that would tell the truth about it all. I have a thing for memoirs of famous people if they claim to tell the truth and others claim they are decently written. From what I can tell, Perry did tell the truth and it was almost decently written. Decently enough to get the details, marvel at the strangeness and bittersweetness of his life, root for him, and then get out.

Matthew Perry is an actor best known for his role as Chandler on Friends . He has also done some movies like Fools Rush In and The Whole Nine Yards and other shows like Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, Mr. Sunshine, Go On , and The Odd Couple (not the one from the 70s). Now mostly writing and producing, it was difficult for Perry to maintain a career while he battled with alcoholism, addiction, and his personal life, which is more what this book is about. The book begins at a low point of near-death in the hospital then moves backward to the beginning—a surprising place where his mother is assistant to the prime minister of Canada and his dad is the Old Spice man. Then it bounces around a bit, never quite establishing where in the story each vignette is (at least for someone not an expert in his career, like me), but creating, even so, a picture of what it was like to be Matthew Perry, which ends with the conclusion that he would have given up all the amazing things—and there were some amazing things—for the life of a healthy, un-addicted, “normal” person. Because being Chandler made life anything but normal and his addictions often made his life a living hell.

It’s a little hard to explain how I ended up reading this book. I am a fan of Friends . I also like comedic books, though I tend to be hard on them: I want to really lol. And I do have a curiosity about the lives of the famous, but not in a tabloid-y way—I am curious about what it is really like to be just a person who is living a supremely bizarre life, one that so few live. So I guess that explains why I chose this book over, say, Spare by Prince Harry (which I am avoiding) or Becoming by Michelle Obama (which, actually, I would like to read eventually). This is not my usual genre, but I like to read what the masses are reading, sometimes.

It probably won’t make you fall off your seat when I reveal that the writing in Friends, Lovers is not amazing. At times, it’s pretty bad, actually. (He does write for screen, and I have read that he wrote this book without a ghostwriter. So the literary merit is understandably small .) And it’s not particularly funny, not in the way that Chandler is funny—this is a much more serious tour of life—though I did snicker aloud now and again or even read a funny line to my husband. So a little funny, sure, because Perry had to deliver. More often, I read aloud some interesting fact about Perry’s life, Hollywood, or addiction. Since I like reading fame exposes that have some sort of depth to them, I was engaged in the story (stories) and read almost the entire book on a car trip between North Carolina and Syracuse. The last and probably only other similar thing I have read was Little Girl Lost by a young Drew Barrymore, and I was transfixed, then, too. I wasn’t quite as gob-smacked this time, but there were plenty of moments where I said to someone, “Can you believe this?”

Still, the point of the whole thing is to sketch a portrait of someone who has struggled with addiction and therefore pain and failure. It’s not sugarcoated. Perry should have been dead half a dozen times and we read about some of the gross and gory bits as well as about the lost relationships, dashed hopes, and destroyed intentions. Perry wants us to know that he had no say in having this disease, that he has worked hard to deal with it but often been powerless. He gives a lot of credit to his family and friends and ultimately tells us that there is a God and that he has encountered It. The book feels like more than just an apology or an explanation, though, it feels like he’s reaching out with his story to those who also struggle with addiction and to those who know someone who struggles with addiction. It is, after all, rather normal to have to fight those battles, it’s just not normal to have to do it while being one of the most famous people on the planet and making people globally laugh in unison once a week for years. And while there are some Friends stories and other Hollywood name-names stories, ultimately Friends, Lovers is more concentrated on a man alone with his demons and his sobriety companion, thankful for one more day to help another person find one more day of sobriety, themselves. Though the book is seriously disjointed, if you are curious enough, then it’ll be a fine read for you.

BONUS REVIEW: FRIENDS TV SERIES

I already mentioned above that I like the show, Friends . I was a little young to appreciate it during its original run, and I was also on a different planet from these hip city-dwellers who were sleeping around and religion-less. I mean, the truth is that the show isn’t exactly realistic in several ways (like their lifestyle versus their jobs), but I’m just saying I couldn’t relate. A decade or so later, I found Friends on streaming and devoured the entire thing. I mean, I had encountered episodes here or there, but it turns out the overarching narrative is really quite compelling (though it does go off the rails a few times, trying to stretch out content to meet the desires of the audience instead of just telling the story and bowing out). But we are always wondering (from episode one!) if Ross will get Rachel. Also, it is fricking hilarious. Yeah, still can’t relate to being a young, single, New Yorker with a questionable moral base, but these characters and situations actually earn their laugh tracks, so, much like Seinfeld and New Girl —other shows I have so little in common with but love —I gobbled up the series, twice, and imagine I’ll do it again. Really, with some of the best moments in TV, some of the quintessential scenes, Friends is likely to remain as ridiculously famous as it was from the beginning, well into the future, and if you appreciate good TV as just good TV, this classic is where to find it.

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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry

About the Book “Hi, my name is Matthew, although you may know me by another name. My friends call me Matty. And I should be dead.” So begins the riveting story of acclaimed actor Matthew Perry, taking us along on his journey from childhood ambition to fame to addiction and recovery in the aftermath of a life-threatening health scare. Before the frequent hospital visits and stints in rehab, there was five-year-old Matthew, who traveled from Montreal to Los Angeles, shuffling between his separated parents; fourteen-year-old Matthew, who was a nationally ranked tennis star in Canada; twenty-four-year-old Matthew, who nabbed a coveted role as a lead cast member on the talked-about pilot then called Friends Like Us . . . and so much more. In an extraordinary story that only he could tell—and in the heartfelt, hilarious, and warmly familiar way only he could tell it—Matthew Perry lays bare the fractured family that raised him (and also left him to his own devices), the desire for recognition that drove him to fame, and the void inside him that could not be filled even by his greatest dreams coming true. But he also details the peace he’s found in sobriety and how he feels about the ubiquity of Friends , sharing stories about his castmates and other stars he met along the way. Frank, self-aware, and with his trademark humor, Perry vividly depicts his lifelong battle with addiction and what fueled it despite seemingly having it all. Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening—as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for.

My Review As a fan of Matthew Perry after his death I wanted to read the book as soon as it was released. So of course I grabbed the Audio book simply because he was Narrating it. He did an amazing Job of it. It did take me a while to actually because of only listening to it for about 10 minutes a day sometimes more! At first it took me a minute to get into it, but I finally did and can I say WOW! This book will definitely grab you and pull you into his life. I have laughed and cried with this book especially in the end. He talks about his struggles with addiction and recovery not to mention his life on FRIENDS as Chandler, and the rolls he took in other movies. He struggled but in the end it seems like he had finally got the grasp on sobriety. Honestly he was on a path of self destruction and could not get a grasp on life until the end.

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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: 'A candid, darkly funny book' New York Times

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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: 'A candid, darkly funny book' New York Times Paperback – November 1, 2022

Print length 253 pages
Language English
Publisher Headline
Publication date November 1, 2022
Dimensions 5.98 x 1.02 x 9.13 inches
ISBN-10 1472295943
ISBN-13 978-1472295941
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Publisher ‏ : ‎ Headline; 1st edition (November 1, 2022)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Paperback ‏ : ‎ 253 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1472295943
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1472295941
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1.15 pounds
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.98 x 1.02 x 9.13 inches
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Customers find the book to be insightful, powerful, and handsome. They also appreciate the writing style as transparent and awesome. Readers describe the book as very well written, easy to follow, and personal. They find the character strength to be beautiful, vulnerable, and honest. They describe the emotional tone as poignant, scary, and raw. Customers also appreciate authenticity. However, some find the timeline confusing at times.

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Customers find the writing style of the book mind-blowing, amazing, and brutally honest. They also say the story is transparent, awesome, and powerful.

"...Perhaps not Pulitzer winning writing, but powerful and truthful just the same...." Read more

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Customers find the book very insightful, shocking, and unflinching. They say it's interesting to hear about addiction from an addict's perspective. Readers also say the book is eye and heart opening, offering an inspiring message of hope and perseverance. They mention that the author opens up with such raw honesty about his struggles.

" Very eye opening . Easy but gripping read. Gives understanding to the behind the scenes of this FRIENDS actor. Must read." Read more

"Mathew Pretty a brilliant actor and writer he opens up with such raw honesty his struggles his over coming his struggles over and over but behind it..." Read more

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"I found this book to have done an amazing job chronicling Matthew's addiction journey and almost his metamorphosis out of the addiction...." Read more

Customers find the emotional tone poignant, sad, funny, heartwarming, and deeply honest. They also say the language and situations he shares are raw and honest. Customers say the book puts his life in perspective and allows them a look as to how addiction strikes. They say it's insightful, shocking at times, and ends with hope.

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Customers find the book beautifully written, with raw honesty and vulnerability that pulls them in. They also say the author is self-deprecating in a genuine way.

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Customers find the book very well written, easy to follow, and honest. They also say the author does a great job painting a picture of his struggles.

"Very eye opening. Easy but gripping read . Gives understanding to the behind the scenes of this FRIENDS actor. Must read." Read more

"...To me it was an easy , yet heartbreaking read...." Read more

"This book was very emotional . Every time I picked it up I couldn’t put it down (but motherhood and my job stopped me from reading it straight thru)...." Read more

"...Sometimes I found the tone of the book somewhat manic , jumping from place to place, time to time, and often telling the same story two or three..." Read more

Customers find the memoir honest, yet humorous. They say the author tells his story in an entertaining manner. Readers also describe him as witty, charismatic, and a great writer.

"...There is something raw and honest and scary and funny in those words that just made me stop reading and literally highlight it in my Kindle book...." Read more

"This is Matthew Perry through and through. His memoir is honest, yet humorous , and is honestly a little sad...." Read more

"This book made me laugh , it made me cry, it made me sad and moreover I was in complete awe at the tenacity of this beautifully flawed man as he..." Read more

"...I found Chandler handsome, charming, funny and I felt the same for Matthew Perry who portrayed him...." Read more

Customers find the characters in the book brave, courageous, serious, and quippy. They also say the book is riveting, interesting, and has a touch of reality and grit.

"...I personally believe his memoir to be courageous , open and honest...." Read more

"Matthew Perry’s memoir is raw, gritty , emotional and heartbreaking...." Read more

"...He is courageous and honest.My fault is not his story — after all it’s his to tell. The book, though, skips around a lot...." Read more

Customers find the narrative structure confusing, disorienting, and difficult to keep up with. They also say the book skips around in time and place, making it difficult to follow the stream-of-consciousness writing. Readers also mention that the pacing feels uneven and the opening chapter is horrific.

"...Seems listening to it make it more difficult to follow the already jumping timeline . Again, just my observation...." Read more

"...It was time AND place jumping , which in writing, you have to do very carefully. What bothers me, is editors should have picked this up...." Read more

"...memoir is captivating overall, there were moments where the pacing felt slightly uneven ...." Read more

"...I'm glad I did.Yes, the timeline was a bit confusing at times , however Mr. Perry had a talent for writing...." Read more

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BOOK REVIEW
Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing
Book Review : Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing
Book Review: Friends, Lovers And The Big Terrible Thing By Matthew
Matthew Perry Memoir, Friends, Lovers, And The Big Terrible, 55% OFF
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FRIENDS, LOVERS, AND THE BIG TERRIBLE THING
The narrative gets off to a good start with Anderson's nostalgic memories of her childhood in coastal Vancouver, raised by very young, very wild, and not very competent parents. Here and throughout the book, the author displays a remarkable lack of anger.
Book Review: Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Mathew Perry
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening—as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for. 2.4. Buy Book on Amazon.
Review: 'Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing,' by Matthew Perry
If Perry's only goal was to be an inspiration to fellow addicts, he's succeeded. Neal Justin is the Star Tribune's TV critic. Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing. By: Matthew Perry ...
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir
Publication Date: June 25, 2024. Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction. Paperback: 272 pages. Publisher: Flatiron Books. ISBN-10: 1250866456. ISBN-13: 9781250866455. "Hi, my name is Matthew, although you may know me by another name. My friends call me Matty.". So begins the riveting story of acclaimed actor Matthew Perry, taking us along on his ...
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir
An Amazon Best Book of November 2022: One of the biggest celebrity memoirs of 2022, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry, a.k.a. Chandler Bing, is both a story of on-set antics and celebrity make-outs, as well as a tell-all of the insidious nature of addiction. There are juicy stories of fame and fortune (the raucous parties, the private jets), love and sex (guess which ...
The One Where Matthew Perry Writes an Addiction Memoir
Although Perry hopes that "Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing" will eventually be shelved in the self-help section of bookstores, "Friends" fans will find poignant nuggets in its ...
Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: 'A candid, darkly funny
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening - as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for.
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is a memoir by the American-Canadian actor Matthew Perry.It was released by Macmillan Publishers (and by Headline in the UK) on November 1, 2022, a year before Perry's death on October 28, 2023. In the book, Perry details his decades-long struggle with alcoholism and addiction.Perry also details his personal life, including his relationships and time ...
Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: The powerful memoir from
Buy Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: The powerful memoir from the beloved star of Friends by Perry, Matthew (ISBN: 9781472295934) from Amazon's Book Store. Everyday low prices and free delivery on eligible orders. ... I hadn't read any reviews or had any preconceptions of this book, it was just one of those Quick Look for a new ...
Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing
'There's never been a more honest or raw memoir . . . and it may just save lives' Daily Mail'Funny, fascinating, compelling . . . also a wonderful read for fans of Friends' The Times'HI, MY NAME IS MATTHEW, although you may know me by my full name. My friends call me Matty.'So begins the riveting story of acclaimed actor Matthew Perry, taking us along on his journey from childhood ambition to ...
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir
Perry's wryly conversational and self-deprecating style will seem familiar to Friends viewers, like a smarter version of Chandler wrote a book. He is easy to like, if prickly, and as easy to relate to as someone with multiple Banksys and a talent for repeatedly blowing up their own life could be.
Friends, Lovers & the Big Terrible Thing book review
Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing final rating - 4.5. Matthew Perry's memoir Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing was an incredibly powerful tale of a man who, to everyone's untrained eye had everything: money, good looks, fame, popularity, the women, the house, the cars, the career. But behind that, away from the public ...
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening—as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for. Product Details. About the Author.
Friends Lovers, and the Terrible Big Thing
Book Review on Matthew Perry's Friends, Lovers, and the Terrible Big Thing The title of Matthew Perry's autobiography, is a little deceving as the focus on his friends and the show Friends doesn't dominate - rather, it takes second stage to Perry's honest and frank sharing of his addiction to drugs and alcohol.
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry, review: A
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry, review: A bleak, exhausting addiction memoir If you're looking for 90s nostalgia and behind-the-scenes gossip, more fool you.
Matthew Perry Memoir: Addiction, 'Friends' and Biggest Revelations
The actor's new book, 'Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing,' details his addiction issues and lets readers in on never-before-told stories from his long career. In Matthew Perry 's new ...
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening--as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for. Show more.
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry
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Book Review: Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry was pretty popular, for a little time anyhow: another book floating down the stream of famous people memoir/exposes that rose to the top for one reason or another. Since Friends was one of the most popular TV series of all time and Perry's battles with alcohol and drugs (and his weight) were played out in the tabloids and discussed ...
PDF Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
Prologue. Hi, my name is Matthew, although you may know me by another name. My friends call me Matty. And I should be dead. If you like, you can consider what you're about to read to be a message from the beyond, my beyond. It's Day Seven of the Pain. And by Pain, I don't mean a stubbed toe or "The Whole Ten Yards.".
Book Review
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening—as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for. As a fan of Matthew Perry after his death I wanted to read the book as ...
Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: 'A candid, darkly funny
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening—as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for.

FRIENDS, LOVERS, AND THE BIG TERRIBLE THING

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